New Era 2 Discussion

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attackfrog
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New Era 2 Discussion

Post by attackfrog » Fri Dec 07, 2018 11:38 am

I would just like to say that I am very proud of you all and your magnificent entries so far. Keep up the good work.

As a side note, I'm going to be on vacation when signups end on the 31st, so the tournament may or may not start right away after that depending on how much I feel like creating Challonge brackets etc. while I'm hanging out in California. But don't you doubt that this is happening, one way or another.

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Re: New Era 2 Discussion

Post by The Monsterworks » Sun Dec 09, 2018 11:07 am

Me and my full team of completed entries are raring to go!

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Re: New Era 2 Discussion

Post by attackfrog » Fri Jan 04, 2019 6:25 pm

It's (un)surprisingly hard to organize a tournament when you're on vacation! Nevertheless, it's time to start getting this show on the road. Here's some FAQs that people may or may not have actually been asking.

Q. What the heck is going on here?
A. This tournament is basically a joke. It's an opportunity to blow off some steam and design some robots you'd never get away with anywhere else, just toss in some random crap designs you have lying around somewhere, or whatever you feel like.

Q. How is it going to work?
A. Once signups close (at the end of the day on Monday, January 7th) I'll set up some Challonge brackets for each of the weight classes. It'll be double elimination, and I'll be writing all the fights unless someone wants to help out. (Please do, if you're interested.) If you enter a robot in some weird weight class that you made up and nobody else entered, congratulations, you're a winner.

Q. Do I need to write RPs for this?
A. Yes, but if you're going to take this super seriously and write paragraphs of strategy I'm going to politely ask you to desist. I'm not going to be writing very serious writeups for these matches, given the format, and so it's a waste of your time and mine. With that said, feel free to have fun with the RPing! RPs will be due Saturdays at 11:59pm EST as is the standard these days.

Q. What do I get for winning?
A. One million dollarydoos, mailed to your house. No need to send me your mailing address, it'll get there, I promise*.

Q. Okay, but what actually should I be entering into this thing? Is this even a robot combat tournament?
A. This is ARC, so yes. But to the loosest definition of "robot combat" possible. Per rule 9, the most awesome robot wins, so your "robots" should do some cool stuff.

Q. Okay, but what's "cool stuff" supposed to mean?
A. Blowing up your opponent: pretty cool. Blowing up yourself: pretty lame. Blowing up your opponent by blowing yourself up? Oh hi there, Mimi-Chan! Doing a sick 1080 backflip: righteous, dude! The judges know awesome when they see it, and I expect you do too.

Q. I have another question.
A. Ask it here or on Discord!


*I lied. It won't actually get there.

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Re: New Era 2 Discussion

Post by attackfrog » Tue Jan 08, 2019 10:56 am

Let the New Era (2) begin!

The bots are in, the signup post is locked, and this tournament is underway! All of the weight classes had an odd number of entries, so some robots were randomly assigned byes. This worked out reasonably equitably. Here are the brackets:

Lightweight:
Spoiler
Really Lightweight:
Spoiler
Deadweight:
Spoiler
Batmanweight:
Spoiler
This makes our first week matches:

LW: Master Spark (YSMQTHLQYH) vs. Wheelchair FROM HELL (V900)
RLW: Yacare (Trihunter) vs. Rack-em-up Old Printer: F-Word Edition (V900)
DW: John Cena (YSMQTHLQYH) vs. Mimi-Chan (Trihunter)
BW (1): CHOO CHOO MUTHAFUCKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (Rocket) vs. The Godfather (NWOWWE)
BW (2): Deathdestroyer Bot X17 (V900) vs. Plan Z (YSMQTHLQYH)


The arena is the Battlebots arena.

As a reminder, this is a double-elimination tournament, so even if you lose you'll have another chance at least to keep going. Good luck everyone!

And now, get to it! RPs are due this Saturday, January 12th, at 11:59pm EST.

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New Era 2 - Week 1 Results

Post by attackfrog » Sun Jan 13, 2019 2:58 pm

Week 1 Results

Welcome Ladies, Gentlemen, and all the rest of you weirdos! This is the New Era (two) and so the era of fantasy robot combat as you knew it is gone. Forget all you know and prepare to enter... the Battlebox. From Battlebots. Okay, that part is the same.

The packed audience is cheering, impatiently. They've been waiting a while for this to get started, and not all of them realized ahead of time that there were no concession stands here. So they're hungry! Hungry... for robot combat! Let's get started!

Lightweight Division: Master Spark (YSMQTHLQYH) vs. Wheelchair FROM HELL (V900)

Here we have what looks like a completely standard and unaltered wheelchair, facing off against a four-wheel-drive glowing laser of death. The audience is initially baffled at how the wheelchair is going to fight in this match: it doesn't seem to have any drive motors or anything, and though it's reported to have a very powerful weapon, nobody can seem to figure out what the weapon actually is.

But what's this? V900 has sat down in the wheelchair! It appears he is going to be driving it from inside the Battlebox. The safety inspectors are very unhappy about this but the crowd is starting to get rowdy and they have no choice but to let the match start.

And so it does! V900 begins wheeling the chair towards Master Spark, ready to use his Kung Fu skills to take it down. YSMQTHLQYH aims, then presses the giant red button on his controller. ZZZAAPP!! There's a blinding flash followed by an explosion which fills the arena with black smoke. When that clears, Master Spark appears to have turned into a small pile of rubble surrounded by a blast zone, and V900 is nowhere to be seen. The wheelchair, somehow, is unharmed (it must be very lucky!) but all that can be found of its driver is a sneaker and a pair of jean shorts.

Since neither robot can move, both are counted out simultaneously, and this goes to the judges! The judges appreciate V900's bravery (pretty awesome) but are even more impressed by the way Master Spark's laser took out itself, its opponent, and several members of the audience!

Your victor: Master Spark!

Really Lightweight Division: Yacare (Trihunter) vs. Rack-em-up Old Printer: F-Word Edition (V900)

Once things are cleaned up a bit from the last match, the next two competitors are brought in. It's a crocodile with propellers against some sort of totally genius robot idea. It's so well designed that even the robot itself has 42069 (nice) intelligence points. Incredible. The audience is in awe.

But how is Yacare going to fight in this one? It's designed for an aquatic environment, and though this tournament is sponsored by Aquatic Robotics, there's no water in sight. Or... wait! Maybe there is! Trihunter has brought a huge barrel along and is dumping its contents into the Battlebox. Hey- that's not water! It appears to be copies of the script of Crocodile Dundee! The judges are baffled, but allow it.

"Fuck," says Rack-em-up Old Printer as it slowly creeps towards Yacare, which spins its propellers mostly ineffectually. It gets some purchase on the Crocodile Dundee scripts, but not much. Meanwhile, Rack-em-up has tripped and fallen on its face. What a clumsy robot! But it gets going again and... whoa! What a maneuver! This is some real next level thinking... a true example of the New Era. Yacare has somehow been picked up by Rack-em-up's wedge and put in its "dumpster." Nobody thought it could fit in there, but, somehow, V900 did it. Incredible.

The judges stop the match there, because, I mean, what could be more amazing than that? Rack-em-up wins against all odds.

Deadweight Division: John Cena (YSMQTHLQYH) vs. Mimi-Chan (Trihunter)

Now we've got a happy-looking 6WD missile against... well, I'm not quite sure. There's something there, I think, but I can't quite make out what it is. But all right, off we go!

Mimi-chan angles around a bit, trying to make out where its opponent is, picks the likeliest spot, and launches in at full speed. Zoom! John Cena dashes to the side as fast as it can. But not quite fast enough! Mimi-chan clips the rear end of John Cena, bounces off, and soars majestically into the lexan, where it explodes. John Cena is smoking (oh, that's where it is!) and half-crushed but it can still limp a bit with its front wheels.

That means that John Cena is the winner!

Batmanweight Division: CHOO CHOO MUTHAFUCKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (Rocket) vs. The Godfather (NWOWWE)

After some more debris cleaning, we see a rather elderly but distinguished robot packing a rack of sawblades being wheeled into the arena, alongside what looks like a piece that fell off a train. This should be a good one!

The buzzer starts, and the flywheel starts going. "Chuff, chuff, chuff, chuff, CHOO CHOO, MUTHAFUCKAAAAAAAA!" Those noises aren't coming from the robot, that's Rocket in the driver's box yelling at the top of her voice. Meanwhile, The Godfather has got its saws spinning away and is moving in to deal with its opponent like it killed its brother. It's going for CHOO CHOO's exposed wheels! Seeing what's happening, Rocket pauses with the train sound effects and sends CHOO CHOO in on the attack as well. A mighty clash of weapons ensues. Neither robot escapes unscathed, and both are sent flying. The saws prove unexpectedly durable, but some of them are missing some teeth, and the flywheel is looking pretty scraped up.

But here the train starts pulling out of the station, so to speak. CHOO CHOO MUTHAFUCKAAA is quite a bit speedier than The Godfather, as well as more agile, and is starts putting that to great effect, getting several good hits on The Godfather's sides. But The Godfather hasn't weathered so many attempts on its life for no reason, and it keeps going unfazed. Still, it's not the young gun it used to be either, and it has trouble getting any bites on CHOO CHOO with its saws.

Both drivers begin to realize that this match is going nowhere fast. Neither can do much damage to the other. To break the stalemate, Rocket proposes an arm-wrestling competition between the two robots. The judges are a bit confused how it will work, given that neither robot has arms, but NWOWWE's Italian pride does not allow him to refuse, and so they accept the proposal. The two are set together,
the bell sounds, and... CHOO CHOO MUTHAFUCKA wins almost instantly! Dang, that's one strong train! NWOWWE shakes his head in shame.

Your winner, by arm-wrestling, CHOO CHOO MUTHAFUCKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!

Batmanweight Division: Deathdestroyer Bot X17 (V900) vs. Plan Z (YSMQTHLQYH)

It's finally the last fight of the night! What's left of the audience is about ready for this to wrap up, and they appear to be eyeing the fastest route to the exits. In comes a clone of Nightmare painted in very ugly colors, and a brain in a jar with propellers attached. Okay, off they go!

The brain takes to the air and flies over to the drivers' booth. It begins speaking in very soothing tones "My name is Plan Z. V900, you don't need to fight. Just surrender to YSMQTHLQYH. It will all be so much easier." But wait! That's not V900 in the driver's box! He's switched with Donkey Kong, and DK doesn't look happy about being mistaken for someone else! He goes on a rampage, slamming his hands on the ground and breaking everything around him! YSMQTHLQYH dodges out of the way, but DK's transmitter isn't so agile and gets pulverized. Realizing what he's done, DK begins sulking and starts munching on a banana.

Meanwhile, Deathdestroyer Bot X17, a.k.a. Dick Johnson, has been rocketing around the arena at top speed, trying to reach Plan Z with its spinning wheel. It can't quite reach, but it's not smart enough to think of another idea. Plan Z, seeing its failure with DK, goes over to try to persuade the judges to hand it the win. But as Dicky J's still moving, they're hard to convince. Plan Z uses its superior mental abilities to provide some very moving arguments. But the judges are holding out for some kind of compensation, and when none is forthcoming, they deny Plan Z's request.

So the stalemate continues, with Plan Z hovering around, coming up with various genius plans, and Dick Destroyer x17 rocketing around the arena like a madman. And then! Out of the corner of its eye, Dick spots an ankle exposed by an audience member who, bored, had got up to sneak away. Its simultaneous surge of lust and self-loathing causes Dick to turn way too quickly and flip itself over. It tries its best, but it can't get back on its wheels, and is counted out. Donkey Kong covers his face with his hands and slowly walks out.

Your winner, by surprise ankle, is Plan Z! (Did it see this coming the whole time?)
Last edited by attackfrog on Mon Jan 14, 2019 7:27 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Added the Batmanweight results

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New Era 2 - Week 2!

Post by attackfrog » Mon Jan 14, 2019 7:43 pm

All the results have been written and posted by yours truly (please read them, I wasted so much time on this), so let's begin Week 2! You can check out the brackets a few posts up: they've been updated too. We've got semifinal matches coming up in Lightweight, Really Lightweight, and Deadweight, and a round 2 match and the first losers' match in Batmanweight.

Your fights for this week:

  • LW: Why (Trihunter) vs. Master Spark (YSMQTHLQYH)
  • RLW: Regretful Overlord (YSMQTHLQYH) vs. Rack-em-up Old Printer: F-Word Edition (V900)
  • DW: Chaos 2 2 (V900) vs. John Cena (YSMQTHLQYH)
  • BW (winners): Chrazedortic (Trihunter) vs. CHOO CHOO MUTHAFUCKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA (Rocket)
  • BW (losers (yeah you heard me)): Deathdestroyer Bot X17 (V900) vs. The Godfather (NWOWWE)


The deadline is Saturday, January 19th, at 11:59pm. Be there or be square!

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Re: New Era 2 Discussion

Post by attackfrog » Mon Jan 28, 2019 10:23 pm

You may have noticed I haven't posted results for the second week yet, and a whole week (plus some) has gone by. This is because I lost motivation to write results. Sorry friends. The school semester also starts this week for me so I'll have less free time and energy for this sort of thing. There's a couple options for what to do now:
  • If you want to write some results, we can pull together as a team and finish this thing off in the next couple weeks
  • We can just call the thing now and give everyone a participation trophy
  • We can put it on hiatus and pick it up at some point in the future
Lemme know what you want to do.

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