ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

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MadBull
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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by MadBull » Fri Dec 04, 2020 3:29 am

Gilles enters the scene.

"Gilles, 25, homo sapiens
Every caveman has these things he does when he's pissed off. Flip a rock, punch a wall, use that syllable Gilles's tribe uses that I can't type here for legal reasons. You know, all the deeply offensive stuff.
The difference is, Gilles does them all the time.
For Gilles has tourette's."

Gilles sees a rock.

Gilles flips the rock.

Gilles made an impact.

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Madman
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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by Madman » Fri Dec 04, 2020 2:57 pm

Cavemen Currently Alive:

There are 41 cavemen alive!

Including: First, Grug, Ee'rah, Oop, Lurk, Puck, Nope, Ren, Brick, O'ko, Gilles
Human ~ Neanderthal ~ Denisovan ~ Erectus ~ Floresien ~ Male ~ Female

Good Luck, Cavemen!!!

Tartarus Robotics Group: Infinitely wise and merciful since 2016
(don't ask about before that)

Black Dog ||| Hellhound V ||| Blood Eagle ||| Santangelo ||| Hellhound VII ||| Hoarfrost

CBC4: 26-5
Featherweight: Black Dog III (6-2)
Lightweight: Blood Eagle (7-1)
Middleweight: Hoarfrost (9-0) CHAMPION!
Heavyweight: Santangelo (5-2)
Vexed!
Lightweight: Thundercaller (1-0)
Current Roster: 183-40 (.821)
Black Dog (ROBOTS - MW*, ROBOTS3 - FW, CBC4 - FW): 26-5
Blood Eagle (CBC3 - LW*, CBC4 - LW): 15-2
Detroit Iron (ICEcrown - SHW): 6-2
Hellcat (Thunder Underground - MW): 2-0
Hellhound (R: Extinction - HW, Pressure Drop - HW, RB2 - HW, ROBOTS - HW, New Blood - HW*, ROBOTS 3 - HW*, Thunder Underground - HW): 46-11
Hoarfrost (RB2 - MW, Armageddon! - MW, Ruination 4 - LW, Thunder Underground - LW, CBC4 - MW*): 23-5
Krakatoa (Robo-Con - LW, Ruination 4 - SHW, Thunder Underground - LW): 11-2
Meanstreak (RB2 - LW, Ruination 4 - HW): 10-3
Santangelo (CBC3 - SHW*, CBC4 - HW): 13-3
Sundancer (Ruination 4 - MW, R: Revival - MW, REDDIT - HW, R: Evolution - FW): 21-4
Talons Out (ROBOTS - FW): 10-3
Thundercaller (Vexed!): 1-0
Yet to Fight
Hadean, Intimidator, Kurosaki-kun, Midnight Sun, Neon Rampage
Retired
Eye of Newt, Morality, Savage, Tiger, Vicious, Wild Child
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Hellhound - #1
Black Dog - #2
Blood Eagle - #11
Sundancer - #24
Hoarfrost - #49

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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by MadBull » Fri Dec 04, 2020 3:11 pm

Gilles sees teddy bear

Gilles goes to teddy bear

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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by hide » Fri Dec 04, 2020 8:54 pm

Hooray For Lexan wrote: Fri Dec 04, 2020 3:22 am Grug intrigued by wood shell. It like bones but made of wood. Or like basket. Grug poke with long stick. It make hollow sound. Would make good drum, but also good shelter. Not tall enough to sit down except for small people, but can put on stilts. But Grug have bad thought. Wood shell much too big to carry as basket even for strong man. But if there small people, maybe there also big people? Grug consider basket. Very, very big people. As big as tall trees. Or maybe made for mammoth to carry.

That maybe problem. Grug need better weapon than funny club. Grug look at wide stick. It heavy, stout. Thin end is not as thin as funny club, feels better in hand. Wide end good for bashing. Here is proper club, Grug think. Very smooth too. But too long, awkward in one hand. Maybe better if break in half, or would be good spear.

Grug roll basket over. It heavy. Grug regret skipping leg day. But Grug strong. There is rope inside basket. There also two stone rings on sides. Ahh. Handles? Rope look strong enough for giant to carry basket with. But rings too thin. Grug whack with club. But ring not break. Maybe bend a little, but not splinter. Like green wood, but... stone? Same stone as funny club. Grug have idea. Hit blowpipe end on shell. Not hard, but enough to break stone easy. Funny club not break.

Grug put all clubs in basket. He look at skinny man. Grug point at basket, then at forest. Then he grab rope. Two strong men maybe carry basket, but stranger is thin. Eat too much berry, not enough meat. Have to drag instead. "Grug pull. You push," Grug say.
Oh great, it’s one of them.... oh well

First, although not particularly motivated to do so, follows Grug’s instructions, albeit in a somewhat lethargic way. He just wanted rest, escape.....well, if his “tribe” wasn’t here (wherever here was), he at least got the 2nd part.
Spoiler
Taskmaster: Reckoning: Evolution (0-4)
Taskmaster V2: REDDIT 2 (3-3)
Taskmaster V3: Thunder Underground (3-1), ARC Rumble (lost)
Taskmaster V4/King Crimson: Not the Football League (1-0), CBC 4 (2-4)
taskMASTER: Pat’s Reddit Tournament (3-2)
Spoiler
SPINNERFOOD: Thunder Underground (1-2), CBC 4 (4-4), CBC4 Rumble (lost)
Spoiler
D O N O T C R O S S: Thunder Underground (2-0)
Killer Queen: CBC 4 (2-4)
SPECTRALS: ROBOT4 (0-1)
CRAZY DIAMOND: ROBOT4 (2-1)
Ki: PAT'S TOURNAMENT (5-0) CHAMPION
DEAD BABY CANNON: RUMBLE IN DA JUNGLE (4-2)
MADE IN HEAVEN: ROBOT4 (1-1)
Record: 33-29
Notable Achievements:
  • Champion (Kira), Pat’s Antweight Tourney

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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by attackfrog » Fri Dec 04, 2020 9:18 pm

O'ko is stopped dead in his tracks by the appearance of two other... people? They look totally unlike anyone O'ko has ever seen, but... unmistakably people. Comforted a little by the idea of safety in numbers, he cautiously approaches them, checking for any threatening movements. They're looking into some kind of large, hollow rock, and appear to be so engrossed with what is inside it that they don't even see O'ko approach.

O'ko looks inside the rock as well (is it really a rock, though?) and sees... well, he has no idea what any of these things are. But some of them look very sharp, much sharper than any of the rocks he'd used for cutting things back home. He grabs a pair of the likeliest-looking ones (cutlasses, though he doesn't know that of course) and starts feeling a bit more confident. Just let that giant bird try him now!

What are the other two up to, he wonders?


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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by Madman » Fri Dec 04, 2020 10:03 pm

Ee'rah, Lurk, O'ko, and Gilles

Ee'rah has a boom-stick. It's a nice big one and it has a shoulder strap. The tall, scaredy ape-man has calmed down and walks up to the The giant flying beast is gone, but she still glances up at the sky warily and keeps waiting for the dark girl to say or do something. Her ambivalent ally, however, seems more interested in studying the various boom-sticks and cutty-stabby things. The tall ape-man has grabbed two of the latter and he swishes them through the air looking quite a bit more confident. Meanwhile, the two women share a few friendly-but-awkward glances before the redhead decides to take the initiative. "Hi," she says, holding a hand up in greeting, "I'm Ee'rah." She points to herself. "Ee'rah."

The dark girl blinks. It looks like an effort for her to make eye contact. Maybe all of her strange people are shy like that, Ee'rah supposes. After a moment, though, she replies with what has to be a greeting. Then, "I'm Lurk." She holds a hand up.

"Lurk," Ee'rah repeats.

"Mm-hm," Lurk acknowledges. "Hey..." she picks up a strange cube with a big circle on it that looks a bit like an animal's eye. She holds it out to Ee'rah and makes a questioning face. Ee'rah takes it with a nod and holds it out cautiously in front of herself. This is another alien thing like the boom-sticks. She is ravenously curious, but she doesn't trust any of these odd things. There are little movable parts that you can press and turn and whatever. Holding the strange cube well away from her body and careful not to point it at any other people, Ee'rah presses a large button. There's a flash and something inside it moves. She can feel it through her hand. "Eeek!" she yelps, jumping backwards but still holding the cube for some reason. The ape-man darts a few steps back too, eyes bugged out at the offending thing. Ee'rah doesn't dare bring it close to her head, but she listens closely. It's... vibrating. There are little noises coming from inside. Lurk regards her and the box, eyes wide. She starts saying something and pointing and then Ee'rah notices it too. It's... growing a tongue. They both watch in fascination. The ape-man watches warily. The tongue is black with white edges but, as they observe, it starts to grow... colours. Then, it falls out, fluttering slowly towards the ground. Lurk plucks it deftly out of the air. Her jaw drops. "Ee'rah!" she shouts. "Ee'rah! Look!" It is... a picture.

Ee'rah rips it from her friend's hands. She stares at it, as the other two try to get a look. She is the best artist in her clan, but she could never dream of painting something so perfect. It looks... exactly like the part of the forest that she was pointing the cube's 'eye' at when she made it flash. So many possibilities fill her mind. Is there a tiny person in there, painting it with incredible skill? Is this an animal that can make some strange leaf that it keeps inside its belly change colours to look like its surroundings? Maybe that is how it hides itself from predators. Yet... this thing doesn't seem alive. "Wow..." she breathes, letting the statement linger in the humid air. Then, Ee'rah gets an idea. She turns the eye to face herself, smiles, and makes it flash. She blinks and nearly drops it, but watches as the picture is made. Lurk starts saying things and motioning for Ee'rah to give her the picture-maker. The ape-man is still there too. Absently, the Neanderthal hands the Denisovan her new toy. She thinks she can trust Lurk to return it. She has... a picture of herself: a perfect picture. She studies it, enraptured, until she notices the ape-man again. She turns to him. "I'm Ee'rah." She points to herself and then to the picture, grinning. "What's your name?" she points to him.

It is roughly at this point that Gilles arrives, having flipped some rocks over on the beach for... reasons. There are at least a few others starting to filter into the clearing, but he is first, and he makes a beeline for the huge square. Inside, he finds a small bear - but not a real one - and lifts it from the mass of weapons, food, and other strange things. Immediately, the eyes of every Neanderthal present - including Ee'rah's - turn his way.

Puck, Brick, Grug, and First

Puck is having fun with his new boomstick, scaring the tiny ape-men, when he hears voices from down at the water's edge. A big loud man with a boomstick has found a big wooden shell. He is... breaking it. Then, dragging it. He is trying to get a skinny man to help him. The skinny man does not look very interested. Probably because he is weak. "Come!" Puck tells the dark hunter with the good boomstick beside him. "We look!" The man has big words that Puck does not know, but if he starts walking, the man will understand. "Me Puck," he says, pointing to himself. "You?" He points to the man. He decides to make his way to the waves. Someone strong like him can lift the wood shell. Maybe can hide under it from the giant scary bird. Then hit bird with boomsticks. Kill bird. Eat bird. Puck is a great hunter. Now he has a great weapon.

Nope & Ren

Nope waits awkwardly for the woman to answer. Maybe they don't speak the same language. Dammit. That would've made things a lot easier. Things are happening nearby. Some big men have a really large, strange boat - better than any she's ever seen - and one of them is going to break it like an idiot. Others seem to be hurrying further into the island, to where Nope thinks she spots a break in the trees. There might be things worth having over there. She decides to wait for a moment longer.

Oops & Meep
Oops
Pretty much the exact same as Oop
Oops is scared. He runs, like most of his people, away from that shiny death-stick. Someone's head is gone. There is a very big animal. It's bigger than the lizards that try to eat him. It flies. This is a place of bad dreams. Oops trips and stumbles, but finds a safe place behind a log on the beach. There is something there that looks like an egg... but also a rock. It has a little curly horn sticking out of it. Oops pokes at it. A nosy girl yells at him not to. He waves her off. He grabs it by the curly horn, but the horn falls out. The strange, shiny egg tumbles to the ground. He goes to grab it, but the annoying girl gets there first and throws it away towards the big man with the death-stick who was scaring them. Oops yells at her that it was his. She yells back that he shouldn't touch shiny things. Shiny things mean death. It occurs to Oops that death might now be sailing through the air towards the four men on the beach. Indeed, he is correct. It is a grenade. It will land close to them, but probably just within the water.
Tartarus Robotics Group: Infinitely wise and merciful since 2016
(don't ask about before that)

Black Dog ||| Hellhound V ||| Blood Eagle ||| Santangelo ||| Hellhound VII ||| Hoarfrost

CBC4: 26-5
Featherweight: Black Dog III (6-2)
Lightweight: Blood Eagle (7-1)
Middleweight: Hoarfrost (9-0) CHAMPION!
Heavyweight: Santangelo (5-2)
Vexed!
Lightweight: Thundercaller (1-0)
Current Roster: 183-40 (.821)
Black Dog (ROBOTS - MW*, ROBOTS3 - FW, CBC4 - FW): 26-5
Blood Eagle (CBC3 - LW*, CBC4 - LW): 15-2
Detroit Iron (ICEcrown - SHW): 6-2
Hellcat (Thunder Underground - MW): 2-0
Hellhound (R: Extinction - HW, Pressure Drop - HW, RB2 - HW, ROBOTS - HW, New Blood - HW*, ROBOTS 3 - HW*, Thunder Underground - HW): 46-11
Hoarfrost (RB2 - MW, Armageddon! - MW, Ruination 4 - LW, Thunder Underground - LW, CBC4 - MW*): 23-5
Krakatoa (Robo-Con - LW, Ruination 4 - SHW, Thunder Underground - LW): 11-2
Meanstreak (RB2 - LW, Ruination 4 - HW): 10-3
Santangelo (CBC3 - SHW*, CBC4 - HW): 13-3
Sundancer (Ruination 4 - MW, R: Revival - MW, REDDIT - HW, R: Evolution - FW): 21-4
Talons Out (ROBOTS - FW): 10-3
Thundercaller (Vexed!): 1-0
Yet to Fight
Hadean, Intimidator, Kurosaki-kun, Midnight Sun, Neon Rampage
Retired
Eye of Newt, Morality, Savage, Tiger, Vicious, Wild Child
ARC Hall of Fame
Hellhound - #1
Black Dog - #2
Blood Eagle - #11
Sundancer - #24
Hoarfrost - #49

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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by hide » Fri Dec 04, 2020 11:11 pm

More of them......
But one of them has that shiny thing, the one that created that noise.....
If they can get one, may as well get one too. It’ll be useful if my “tribe” shows up again.....

First begins looking for a weapon.....
Spoiler
Taskmaster: Reckoning: Evolution (0-4)
Taskmaster V2: REDDIT 2 (3-3)
Taskmaster V3: Thunder Underground (3-1), ARC Rumble (lost)
Taskmaster V4/King Crimson: Not the Football League (1-0), CBC 4 (2-4)
taskMASTER: Pat’s Reddit Tournament (3-2)
Spoiler
SPINNERFOOD: Thunder Underground (1-2), CBC 4 (4-4), CBC4 Rumble (lost)
Spoiler
D O N O T C R O S S: Thunder Underground (2-0)
Killer Queen: CBC 4 (2-4)
SPECTRALS: ROBOT4 (0-1)
CRAZY DIAMOND: ROBOT4 (2-1)
Ki: PAT'S TOURNAMENT (5-0) CHAMPION
DEAD BABY CANNON: RUMBLE IN DA JUNGLE (4-2)
MADE IN HEAVEN: ROBOT4 (1-1)
Record: 33-29
Notable Achievements:
  • Champion (Kira), Pat’s Antweight Tourney

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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by attackfrog » Sat Dec 05, 2020 8:38 pm

O'ko sees one of the two other... people take a small object out of the hollow rock. Suddenly, a flash of lightning comes from it! O'ko cowers, terrified again, but the thunder doesn't come, even after a second flash. He looks up again, and the person is holding a small piece of bark with... herself on it? It doesn't make any sense at all. This person clearly has magical powers and must be some sort of god. She makes some noises he doesn't understand, except that "Eeera" seems to refer to herself. He lowers his cutters and tries to look non-threatening. You never know what gods will do. "O'ko," he says, indicating himself. "O'ko friend." He doesn't know if she will understand, but it wouldn't hurt to be friends with a god.


The Dirty Dozen - Swordfish 3 / Speed Bison / Whirlpool | (Entry Post)
ARC: Association of Rejected Cfreations - Grey Squirrel | (Entry Post)

Frogbot 2000: ROBOT2 Middleweight Champion!
Speed Bison: Ruination IV Superheavyweight 2nd Place

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Hooray For Lexan
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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by Hooray For Lexan » Sat Dec 05, 2020 9:56 pm

Boat heavy. Skinny man phoning it the fuck in. Grug shake head in annoyance.

Then big boom somewhere on beach. Grug spin around. Cloud of sand and water in air. Still no storm cloud in sky. Still no cliff for rock to fall. This time nobody with funny club, but one small man have guilty look on face.

This too strange. Basket good shelter in storm and maybe stop falling rock, but too small for all people. There will be fight if Grug try to make shelter, and not all people small. Some of them staring at Grug and skinny man.

Grug take funny club and one good club out of basket. Grug walk into forest. Need break wood for fire and shelter. Wait. No axe. That problem.

Grug shout at nobody in particular. Ask if anybody find good rock for axe.

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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by YSMQTHLQYH » Sat Dec 05, 2020 10:55 pm

Ren to herself: Wait, this woman speaks the same language that i do...
Awkwardly says "hi, how are you" while waving hand with the pistol
Brick realizes that someone may be talking to him
Wait, you talking to me
me brick, me lift things

Brick follows the man while doing his best to help
TEAM DESIGN FLAW
Recent history
Dirty Dozen -
Something Something I Regret Nothing 0-0
I Suck At Names II 0-0
OTSC v2.0 0-0

Butcher's Circus -
Evaccania DOOM 0-0

ROBOT4 -
Cyan Printer Ink 4-1 // Multiply and Surrender 2-1 // Apeirogon II 4-0 (Champion!) // Total 10-2

CBC4 -
Vindicator 4-2 // Apeirogon 4-3 // Pressure Flop II 5-3 // Padoru Machina 3-3 // Total 16-11
less recent stuff
Thunder Underground -
OTSC 2-0 // Need For Spin 1-1 // FREE ICE CREAM 0-1 // Cookie Cutter 1-0 // Total (i guess) 4-2

REDDIT - Terrorbird 4-1
Reckoning: Evolution - Riptide 2-2
ROBOT3 -
Beaned 2-5 //<3 5-3 // Pressure Flop 4-3 // Omnicrap 2.0 2-5 // Total 13-16

CBC3 -
Evil Destroyer 4-4 // I Suck At Names 5-3 // Something Something Cluster Bot 3-3 // Equisde 3-3 // Total 15-13

ICEcrown - Hovercrap 3-3
REDDIT(2K18) - Omnicrap 3-3
Overall record: 70-53

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Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by Madman » Sat Dec 05, 2020 11:55 pm

By the Supply Crate

Lurki Lurki: The sudden influx of people is too much for Lurk to take. She retreats with a slice of pizza hanging out of her mouth, a can of spam in one hand, a raincoat, and lots of knives, a rapier, and a couple of pistols. She settles under the shelter of a clump of large ferns and peers out at the new arrivals, her agoraphobia kicking in bigtime. At least she has lots of cool new things.

Ee'rah, O'ko, and Gilles: Ee'rah is pretty pleased with herself. She feels bad for Lurk, but it's not like she can force the painfully shy girl to do things. This ape-man is pretty fun, though. She doesn't understand a word that he's saying, but she gets that his name is O'ko. He's amazed at her picture and seems generally in awe of her. Ee'rah has higher hopes than this guy, but she twirls her hair a bit and smiles and... it's just nice when men are impressed by you. Okay!? Then another man shouts from somewhere closer to the beach - just out of sight - and Ee'rah can understand him... kinda. Axe! He's looking for an axe! Thank the Bear God! "Over here! she shouts back. "Follow my voice! Go where everyone's going!" She grabs an axe for him. This now means two men who'll think she's great. This situation is all kinds of fucked, but hey, you make the best of things. Ee'rah stands there for a moment, slurping up a slice of pizza, and she decides to take a picture of O'ko to further burnish her credentials. However, one of the new arrivals - a skinny man - who's been rifling through the big square stops. She'd previously paid him little attention, but then...

He lifts a tiny representation of the Bear God from the square. Ee'rah's eyes widen. She nearly drops her picture-maker. It is HE! It is SHE! He whose slumber makes the world cold. He whose fur makes man and woman warm. She who gives, takes, and protects life. This is an idol such as she has never seen before. It's... she's not sure why, but she wants to hold it and hug it. She wants to worship it in awe, respect, and mortal terror. She wants to pat its little head and squeeze its little tum-tum. Ee'rah's complexion goes ashen. She must not hold such blasphemous feelings toward the Bear God. Mortified, she drops to her knees, prostrating herself before its divine representation. "Oh great Bear God!" she wails. "Knower of All, Devourer of All! Please forgive my unholy thoughts! Send not death upon thy humble servant-slash-food! Carve not my head from my neck, my squishy bits from inside me with your deadly and glorious claws!"

Others of her people appear similarly affected. Ee'rah risks a peek up. The skinny man seems nonplussed. But then... everything changes.

Near the Beach

Meep & Oops: It takes a few seconds for Meep and Oops to recover from the boom-egg blast. Meep's ego has become insufferable as a result. She points out that the boom-egg would've killed them if she hadn't thrown it, like the boom-club killed the other guy before. She is so much smarter than him and he should listen to her and she doesn't know how he hasn't died and... blah, blah, blas... She's found more eggs now. She yells at Oops that these are real eggs, see! These are what real eggs look like. Oops rolls his eyes. She sits down beside them, all pleased with herself, and Oops regards her tiredly. He marches a couple of steps away, his pride holding him back, but he's hungry, and she's already cracked one open and started to eat it.

Grug: Grug is about to give up on pulling the giant-basket when a big boom right at the edge of the water freaks him out enough to give him just the excuse that he needs. He grabs both his clubs and trudges up the beach, deciding to look for firewood. No axe is a bitch, though. He sighs. He shouts into the forest, hoping that someone will understand. He wait a moment, and hears a shout back. The words are strange, but he can more or less make out their meaning. She has an axe!

First: First isn't very interested in pulling the thing. The short stupid man is grumbling at him anyways and the sudden big boom at the edge of the water confirms his decision. He scampers off and decides to go look for boomsticks or... boom-eggs. Those look useful too. He's just found two, nestled in a small bush, when there's another large sound behind him...

Nope: The other woman is Ren. She seems... summarily disinterested in life. How's Nope, she asks? Nope is... still pretty freaked out, to be honest. This place is ten different levels of weird. Another large boom makes her glance around, eye bugged out, before she settles down again. Still, she'll find her way back home - she knows it - and, when she does, she'll come back with a bounty of boomsticks and other useful things. That's when she hears it: a long, low rumbling growl. That is... a big animal. The noise rises into a hacking yowl that reverberates through the humid air and she watches some... thing emerge from the waves. It's bigger than a mammoth and looks like some unholy cross between a crocodile, a duck, and a fish. "Holy fuck!" she screams, her face a mask of terror. "Run!!!!" Nope suits words to action, drops everything but her bam-club, and runs for her life. She doesn't even look to see if Ren follows. Either you have basic self-preservation instinct, or you die. That's life... and death, she supposes.

Puck and Brick: Puck gets that tingle feeling on the back of his neck just before the sound begins. A huge wave comes far enough up the beach that he almost gets his feet wet near the edge of the trees. The other hunter beside him is less aware. "Watch!" Puck warns. "Big animal coming!" He grins, ready to hunt it with his boomstick, but the... thing that comes out of the water is no animal like he's ever seen. It's bigger than a mammoth, has a mouth like a crocodile, and a big... fin? on its back. Its mouth is larger than him and full of sharp teeth. Puck saw the short strong man hit something with a boomstick from a small distance. Still ready to run, Puck points his boomstick at the animal and presses the thing that makes it boom. It does not happen how he expected. It's like an angry horse kicking his shoulder. Puck stumbles back, balling on his ass, and the boomstick hits nothing. The huge, angry crocodile-beast rears up and swipes at him. Puck rolls out of the way and runs. He doesn't have time to see what happens to the other hunter (Brick), but the creature doesn't follow him and that's all that matters. Instead, it charges up toward the edge of the trees, fast but awkward, like a sea animal on land, making an awful noise. It snaps up one unfortunate woman in its jaws, shakes her back and forth, and tosses her body into the trees. It crushes a tiny ape-man as it goes. Where the fuck is Puck? What the fuck is going on?

Meep & Oops: After storming off, Oops finally swallows his pride and prioritizes his stomach. He's just shuffling back towards Meep, feet heavy with shame, when a series of loud noises causes everyone to look up and around. Oops... trips on a root, faceplants, and groans. The ground is shaking. He pushes himself up on his hands and turns his head just on time to watch the biggest animal he has ever seen come charging through the bushes. Meep looks up, eyes wide, halfway through eating an egg, and has no chance. The monster swallows her in a single massive bite. It settles protectively around the nest, lashing out with its enormous tail and great jaws, and Oops hightails it outta there. Who's the smart one now, Meep?

Nope: From a vantage point near some mangrove roots, Nope watches the monsters rampage, her chest heaving with the recent exertion. It settles in one place, laying about with its tail and jaws, but does not move after killing at least three people. What horror is this!? Nope struggles to take her eyes off of it. However, she does notice something else: a boat - much larger and better-constructed than the simple dugouts that she's seen, bobbing up and down in the shallows just offshore.

Boss Fight?

It's a Mothafuckin' Spinosaurus, bitch! OH NOOOO!!!

You can choose to fight this monster, hide from/avoid it on the small island, or try to get tot he mainland, about 400m away across clear, shallow, but somewhat rough waters. The Spino's nest is on this island, it is extremely territorial but only vaguely interested in active predation, and it will not be budged from here unless you budge it. Beware that this is an immense animal: 16 metres (52 feet) long, 7000kg (7.7 tons), with a thick hide, and an instinctual will to fight to the death to protect its young. You cannot solo it. You probably can't even duo it. However, it's less at home on land than in the water. It also almost certainly won't pursue you if you leave quietly.
Tartarus Robotics Group: Infinitely wise and merciful since 2016
(don't ask about before that)

Black Dog ||| Hellhound V ||| Blood Eagle ||| Santangelo ||| Hellhound VII ||| Hoarfrost

CBC4: 26-5
Featherweight: Black Dog III (6-2)
Lightweight: Blood Eagle (7-1)
Middleweight: Hoarfrost (9-0) CHAMPION!
Heavyweight: Santangelo (5-2)
Vexed!
Lightweight: Thundercaller (1-0)
Current Roster: 183-40 (.821)
Black Dog (ROBOTS - MW*, ROBOTS3 - FW, CBC4 - FW): 26-5
Blood Eagle (CBC3 - LW*, CBC4 - LW): 15-2
Detroit Iron (ICEcrown - SHW): 6-2
Hellcat (Thunder Underground - MW): 2-0
Hellhound (R: Extinction - HW, Pressure Drop - HW, RB2 - HW, ROBOTS - HW, New Blood - HW*, ROBOTS 3 - HW*, Thunder Underground - HW): 46-11
Hoarfrost (RB2 - MW, Armageddon! - MW, Ruination 4 - LW, Thunder Underground - LW, CBC4 - MW*): 23-5
Krakatoa (Robo-Con - LW, Ruination 4 - SHW, Thunder Underground - LW): 11-2
Meanstreak (RB2 - LW, Ruination 4 - HW): 10-3
Santangelo (CBC3 - SHW*, CBC4 - HW): 13-3
Sundancer (Ruination 4 - MW, R: Revival - MW, REDDIT - HW, R: Evolution - FW): 21-4
Talons Out (ROBOTS - FW): 10-3
Thundercaller (Vexed!): 1-0
Yet to Fight
Hadean, Intimidator, Kurosaki-kun, Midnight Sun, Neon Rampage
Retired
Eye of Newt, Morality, Savage, Tiger, Vicious, Wild Child
ARC Hall of Fame
Hellhound - #1
Black Dog - #2
Blood Eagle - #11
Sundancer - #24
Hoarfrost - #49

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Madman
Posts: 541
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm
Location: Fighting in the shade
Team: Tartarus Robotics Group

Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by Madman » Sun Dec 06, 2020 2:32 am

Cavemen Currently Alive:

There are 38 cavemen alive!

Including: First, Grug, Ee'rah, Lurk, Puck, Nope, Ren, Brick, O'ko, Gilles, Oops, Meep
Human ~ Neanderthal ~ Denisovan ~ Erectus ~ Floresien ~ Male ~ Female

Oh no! Three more cavemen died!

Good Luck, Cavemen!!!

Tartarus Robotics Group: Infinitely wise and merciful since 2016
(don't ask about before that)

Black Dog ||| Hellhound V ||| Blood Eagle ||| Santangelo ||| Hellhound VII ||| Hoarfrost

CBC4: 26-5
Featherweight: Black Dog III (6-2)
Lightweight: Blood Eagle (7-1)
Middleweight: Hoarfrost (9-0) CHAMPION!
Heavyweight: Santangelo (5-2)
Vexed!
Lightweight: Thundercaller (1-0)
Current Roster: 183-40 (.821)
Black Dog (ROBOTS - MW*, ROBOTS3 - FW, CBC4 - FW): 26-5
Blood Eagle (CBC3 - LW*, CBC4 - LW): 15-2
Detroit Iron (ICEcrown - SHW): 6-2
Hellcat (Thunder Underground - MW): 2-0
Hellhound (R: Extinction - HW, Pressure Drop - HW, RB2 - HW, ROBOTS - HW, New Blood - HW*, ROBOTS 3 - HW*, Thunder Underground - HW): 46-11
Hoarfrost (RB2 - MW, Armageddon! - MW, Ruination 4 - LW, Thunder Underground - LW, CBC4 - MW*): 23-5
Krakatoa (Robo-Con - LW, Ruination 4 - SHW, Thunder Underground - LW): 11-2
Meanstreak (RB2 - LW, Ruination 4 - HW): 10-3
Santangelo (CBC3 - SHW*, CBC4 - HW): 13-3
Sundancer (Ruination 4 - MW, R: Revival - MW, REDDIT - HW, R: Evolution - FW): 21-4
Talons Out (ROBOTS - FW): 10-3
Thundercaller (Vexed!): 1-0
Yet to Fight
Hadean, Intimidator, Kurosaki-kun, Midnight Sun, Neon Rampage
Retired
Eye of Newt, Morality, Savage, Tiger, Vicious, Wild Child
ARC Hall of Fame
Hellhound - #1
Black Dog - #2
Blood Eagle - #11
Sundancer - #24
Hoarfrost - #49

MadBull
Posts: 2170
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm

Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by MadBull » Sun Dec 06, 2020 3:34 am

"B B B Bear?

BEAR! BEAR! BEAR! BEAR! BEAR! BEAR! BEAR! BEAR! BEAR! BEA..."

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Hooray For Lexan
Posts: 732
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 1969 7:00 pm

Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by Hooray For Lexan » Sun Dec 06, 2020 5:44 pm

Grug examine axe. Handle good, smooth and fit well in hand. Bit small. But head made wrong way round. Handle supposed to be split, not head. And nothing tying it on. Might break? Grug motion red hair girl to stand back. Grug swing at tree. But axe not break. Made of same stuff as funny club.

"Hmm. Good axe," say Grug. Axe very smooth, and shiny. Very sharp too. Girl ignore him. She go back to looking at strange things. Some of them look useful, maybe. Some sort of strange food, but not enough for more than few people. Strange shiny skins with bright color. Maybe good for shelter, but still need wood to build.

Then there roar from beach. Something coming from water. Grug never see thing like it. Fish? Snake? No, it walk on legs, and keep getting taller and taller. Bigger than mammoth. Like... scaly camel with snake or fish head.

Grug look at axe. Grug look at thing. Grug look at axe again.

"Valor better part discretion," say Grug. Grug quote Thag the Wise. Thag the wise die long ago: gored by rhino, then stepped on by mammoth, then eaten by lion. Thag the wise not actually wise. Good idea to leave now. Quietly. Grug point urgently at thing, then into forest. Grug motion for others to follow.

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hide
Posts: 113
Joined: Tue May 21, 2019 1:36 pm
Team: Team C/D

Re: ARC: Anachronistically Rifled Cavemen

Post by hide » Sun Dec 06, 2020 8:32 pm

Oh what in the fuck is that?!

It wasn’t a mammoth, or anything remotely similar. Even the most lurid of descriptions of those Great Ones that his tribe(“s”)’s elders claimed to saw didn’t come close to the.....thing rampaging on the beach right now.

That wasn’t really First’s concern at the moment though. He was instead feeling a sense of fear he had not felt for a “long” time, and a need to run.

And so he did. From whatever it was.

Finding some square object, he leaped behind it and hid. He was shaking. That was a great one? That’ what they really look like?

Was that the Great Bird coming to claim me?

By the...Great Ones, I guess...
Spoiler
Taskmaster: Reckoning: Evolution (0-4)
Taskmaster V2: REDDIT 2 (3-3)
Taskmaster V3: Thunder Underground (3-1), ARC Rumble (lost)
Taskmaster V4/King Crimson: Not the Football League (1-0), CBC 4 (2-4)
taskMASTER: Pat’s Reddit Tournament (3-2)
Spoiler
SPINNERFOOD: Thunder Underground (1-2), CBC 4 (4-4), CBC4 Rumble (lost)
Spoiler
D O N O T C R O S S: Thunder Underground (2-0)
Killer Queen: CBC 4 (2-4)
SPECTRALS: ROBOT4 (0-1)
CRAZY DIAMOND: ROBOT4 (2-1)
Ki: PAT'S TOURNAMENT (5-0) CHAMPION
DEAD BABY CANNON: RUMBLE IN DA JUNGLE (4-2)
MADE IN HEAVEN: ROBOT4 (1-1)
Record: 33-29
Notable Achievements:
  • Champion (Kira), Pat’s Antweight Tourney

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