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ICEcrown Fight Card, Standings, and Results

Posted: Tue Nov 27, 2018 10:07 pm
by The Monsterworks

Welcome to something ridiculous. If you've signed up, you know what you're in for: Internal Combustion Engine-powered insanity. Is this the most competitive tournament out there? Is it a multi-weightclass extravaganza? Will you win a highly coveted title here? No. You'll win the ICEcrown. Is it going to be a lot of fun, at least? That, my pal, I can guarantee. Now, for the most important bits:

The Tournament

1) You'll find all of the rules, info, and the entry list over in the signup thread. Remember that we are using the REDDIT rule system with a few modifications, so RP accordingly. Fights will be judged on the 15 point system taking into account aggression, damage, and control.

2) We're not running a discussion thread. We've got discord for that.

3) The Bracket can be found on Challonge along with updated standings.

4) The opening week's matchups and writing assignments are as follows:
  • (1) Shellshock vs. (7) Chernabog: The_Angry_Goat
  • (2) Death's Head Sarsaparilla vs. (8) Taranis: YSMQTHLQYH
  • (3) Detroit Iron vs. (9) Screamroller: Hooray For Lexan
  • (4) IMMA SCATMAN vs. (10) Labrys: Wolf51-50
  • (5) Hovercrap vs. (11) Maurdread: Rocket
  • (6) Steelhead vs. (12) HMS Bucolic: The Monsterworks
5) The RP limit is 400 words and RPs will be due on Saturday, the 1st of December, at 11:59 PM EST. No extensions on this one, since it's being done in Swiss format and the next round of fights is relying on the previous round's results being written promptly.

The Arena

ICEcrown will be held at The Noir (thanks to Laz for designing this thing).

The Noir by FloatingCastleRobotics on Sketchfab

So, how does this arena work? It's your standard, 50 ft x 50 ft lexan-enclosed box. There is a two foot high wall at the base of the lexan, and immediately behind each bot is an OOTA zone. All of the black floor panels are backlit from beneath, with light shining up through the seams. In the middle of the arena is a small hump with the ARC logo. It is not a damaging hazard and will retract to be flush with the floor after thirty seconds have passed. In the corners are this arena's featured hazards: the Fatales. These are four slightly recessed floor spinners, lit up by strips of white LEDs. Once the match begins, each of the hazards' damage will scale up whenever they are driven over in the manner outlined below:
  • White: the first time that a hazard is driven over, it will spin slowly, dealing no damage. Following that contact, it will turn green.
  • Green: the second time that a hazard is driven over, it will spin at moderate RPM, dealing only one point of damage. Following that contact, it will turn yellow.
  • Yellow: the third time that a hazard is driven over, it will spin somewhat quickly, dealing two points of damage. Following that contact, it will turn orange.
  • Orange: the fourth time that a hazard is driven over, it will spin at high RPM, dealing three points of damage and potentially destroying wheels. Following that contact, it will turn red.
  • Red: the fifth time that a hazard is driven over, it will be spinning at a vicious speed and will deal four points of damage, destroying wheels and damaging body panels. Following that contact, it will turn white and will not spin any faster for the remainder of the fight.

As far as I know, that's everything. Thanks for signing up for this idiosyncratic thing, and I hope you enjoy it as much as I have so far. Any questions, suggestions, etc. can be directed at me on discord. Best of luck!

ICEcrown First Round Results

Posted: Sat Dec 01, 2018 2:20 pm
by The Monsterworks
First Round Results

(1) Shellshock - Team Vertigo: 0-0 ~vs.~ (7) Chernabog - Team Instant Regret: 0-0

Written by The_Angry_Goat

So for whatever fucking reason an entire wedge is “an essential part of a crusher” which means this isn’t a stomp so now I have to go look at how this arena works damnit. Chernabog is off somewhat enthusiastically, Shellshock less so, though neither is particularly fast. I think Chernabog is still one of the fastest bots in this tournament tho. At any rate they eventually collide, a nice little dent forming in the face of Chernabog’s wedge as both bots go flying. Neither recovers that quickly, but shellshock definitely bounces around for quite a bit longer than chernabog. It does manage to get control of itself eventually, but it’s not given much time to plan for the wedge now barreling down on it, and is again scooped up, impacts a different part of the wedge, and goes flying again. chernabog is again on the pursuit as quickly as it can, but the bounces don’t occur at all in its favor and shellshock is up to speed before he gets to it. this time, right before they impact, it looks like shellshock managed to dart to the side a bit. It doesn’t really seem to do much more damage – that area of Chernabog isn’t really corner-ey at all, but it does slap chernabog over one of the floor spinner things, which deals like no damage but does get angrier.
Shellshock manages to recover rather quickly this time, and HFL takes the opportunity to try and ramp up the spinner he’s near. Either that or he mis-drove or something. Regardless, it kicks him away and spins a bit angrier now. Shellshock’s starting to close in at this point so he goes back to being a wedge. The bots smack each other and Shellshock catches on a previous hit it made in the center of Chernabog’s wedge, buckling the wedge a tad in that area. Both bots get smacked away again, but AGAIN shellshock manages to get lucky with its bounces and not end up near chernabog. It does go over an area spinner though, so now that one’s at first level too, for those keeping track at home.
Rinse and repeat encounter, shellshock hits the wedge again, and hits the same spot it hit before, digging in a bit and really sending the two bots flying. This time though shellshock and chernabog land closer together, and shellshock’s still coining a tad bit, not quite up to full speed when chernabog gets to it. the impact is violent, as shellshock is sent flying wildly at an angle, ending up in a corner with a deactivated spinner. chernabog slams into it, and, noting that the arena spinner would do fuck all here, just pins shellshock for 20 seconds, before giraffe frees himself with a combination of wheel and spinner movement spam. He doesn’t really get that up to speed before he gets bullied around some more, and slammed into the angriest of the arena spinners at this point it goes from yellow to orange and kicks shellshock to safety.
Looks like it didn’t deal enough damage to stop the functionality of shellshock, as it gets back up to speed right as chernabog comes in. another HUGE HIT THERE KENNY and both bots go flying. Shellshock slams into the wall behind it and lands right on its wheels, skidding across the arena. Giraffe manages to corral the bot into some amount of controlled order, and moves towards chernabog as the bot comes at him. The final hit of the match is glorious and disappointing in equal measure, as Shellshock finally tears open a giant gap in the front of Chernabog. With only 5 seconds left, they’ve barely recovered from the hit by the time time expires.

Aggression: 3-2 Chernabog
Damage: 4-1 Shellshock
Control: 3-2 Chernabog
Your winner, in an 8-7 judge’s decision, is Shellshock!

(2) Death's Head Sarsaparilla - The Monsterworks: 0-0 ~vs.~ (8) Taranis - Team British Robotics: 0-0


The match begins, Death's Head Sarsaparilla moves out of his square at a 45° angle as fast as it can(not very fast) while Taranis charges straight into DHS. He isn't very fast, but fast enough to reach it´s opponent before they get to full speed.
Even though Taranis´s weapon wasn't at full speed he got a lucky shot and actually flipped DHS, though it bounced a few times and landed right way up without losing too much speed.
After this TBR is somewhat quick to go after another consecutive hit on DHS, but this time not much happened and both bots get thrown away, DHS landing kinda near the corner while Taranis lands closer to the center.
DHS runs away as it isn't quite up to speed yet, BUT Taranis is so TBR goes for another hit and gets lucky again and throws it opponent to the other side of the arena. Nobody seems to be too damaged yet.
Taranis goes for yet another charge but this time he misses, giving DHS enough time to finally get his weapon up to deadly speed.
They both go to attack each other and DHS finally lands a good shot, they both get thrown back quite some distance.
The full body spinner moves back to safely spin up again, while on the other side, well... the drum kinda works and one wheel seems kinda limp, so TBR decides it's good enough and goes for another attack now that DHS isn't at full speed.
His now damaged drive makes it harder for it to reach the retro-style bot, giving said FBS time to fully spin up again.
When they meet again the diesel-powered bot really good shot, and i mean really really good. The entire chassis of Taranis gets bent outward, the weapon axle breaks and the drum itself gets torn off and lands on the other side of the arena.
But TBR´s bot, somehow, is still able to drive, and he is determined to not let DHS get to full speed once more.
Taranis goes to wedge DHS surprisingly quickly, the remaining spinner wasn't close to full power, but it was good enough to break the poorly armored remainder of Taranis.
A side of its drive system still sorta works, but it wasn't enough to qualify as translational movement.

The winner, by knockout in 1:37, is Death's Head Sarsaparilla.

(3) Detroit Iron - Tartarus Robotics Group: 0-0 ~vs.~ (9) Screamroller - Aquatic Robotics: 0-0

Written by Hooray For Lexan

Welcome to ICECrown, folks! It’s about to get LOUD!

Screamroller’s engine roars as it spins its drum up… or rather, down, and it’s a good thing the driver was quick on the throttle because Detroit Iron’s already halfway across the arena, turning past the center nail… and then swerving off in completely the other direction and skidding to a halt with its plow just going onto one of the fatales. The teeth shove it sideways and the LEDs in the floor turn green. Detroit Iron boops the hazard again and turns it yellow, but then has to actually deal with its opponent as Screamroller cautiously approaches.

Detroit Iron, confident in its plow, rams right into Screamroller’s weapon. The flails bounce off in a shower of sparks, and DI pushes underneath, but that leaves Screamroller partially on top of it with the front forks flexing upwards from the impact! Screamroller’s teeth clatter off Detroit Iron’s top armor, punching a hole in one of the guards around its radiators, and just as concerningly clipping a track before the supports spring back and it can’t reach anything but the top of the plow. Detroit Iron lifts its wedge a little, and Screamroller’s drum grinds to a halt. It tries to push forward, but ends up spinning in a circle, the power of its drivetrain sending Screamroller skidding away. One of the tracks is jammed!

Screamroller backs off a little and spins its drum up again. Detroit iron frantically crabs back and forth, throwing its good track forward and into reverse… and the stuck track comes free again! The bot rockets into the wall before Laz can react, but its drivetrain is now working again, albeit with several pads missing from its left track. It approaches a bit more carefully this time, raising its lifter a bit to protect its vulnerable parts from sneaky reacharounds and trying to get to the side of Screamroller’s drum. Screamroller struggles to keep pointed the right way, and gyrodances severely, but manages a head-on collision as Detroit Iron charges in again. And that was a surprisingly solid hit! Detroit Iron is noticeably pushed down into the floor, but Screamroller tips back on its rear and almost over with the drum at a near halt! One of the flail teeth is lying on the arena floor now, and the drum bounces a bit as it starts back up. Looks like DI just rammed its plow past the flails into the solid points where they’re mounted to the drum. And before Screamroller can spin back up, DI jams itself in there again, putting its plow between the drum and the support arms, and drives Screamroller backwards, slamming it into the wall!

Detroit Iron backs off a little and Screamroller tries to drive away, but before it can spin up Detroit Iron wedges it again, lifts, and goes for another slam into the corner! It’s not quite on target. The bots hit the wall like a freight train, rippling the Lexan… and screamroller bounces over onto its back! The drum’s stationary against the floor, the engine’s stalled, and the wheels are spinning uselessly against thin air! Meanwhile Detroit Iron bounces onto the green fatale and gets spun away, and the left track appears to have jammed again, but Screamroller’s getting counted out, and that’s the end of it!

Your winner, by knockout in 0:57, is Detroit Iron!

(4) IMMA SCATMAN - End of the Line LLC.: 0-0 ~vs.~ (10) Labrys - Team Worst Swordsman: 0-0

Written by Wolf51-50 The Monsterworks

Well, for this match, we have one of the top four seeds in action: the heavily favoured 'IMMA SCATMAN' against relative newcomer Labrys, from the occasionally aptly named Team Worst Swordsman. This would seem to be a fairly cut-and-dried result: there's virtually nothing that Labrys' weaponry can really do against its stoutly armoured opponent, and it loses out in the drivetrain department to an almost embarrassing degree. Yup. This is a curbstomp if I've ever seen one. The match starts and Labrys, intent on being tactically brilliant, starts doing its thing. For its part, IMMA SCATMAN... doesn't, uh, start. Labrys drives up to it, disc going at full tilt, but sportingly gives it a little 'boop' instead of attacking. Nothing. Must've been an electrical issue. The referees end this one very, very early and the underdog comes up with an unlikely win that may have serious repercussions later on. The favourite will start out by playing an unintentional Swiss Gambit, and we'll have to wait to see if it pays off.

Result: Labrys wins by KO (FF) at 0:17

(5) Hovercrap - Team Design Flaw: 0-0 ~vs.~ (11) Maurdread - Team Obscure: 0-0

Written by Rocket

The battle starts with the roar of a V8 already in place as Hovercrap's propellors keep it aloft, but it's soon joined by the hum from its spinners and the harmonising rasp of Maurdread's own engine. Both bots head straight for each other, but Hovercrap turns slightly, powering down its lower disc to turn and try to... wait, are even hovercraft not safe from the pernicious influence of angling in? Oh well. It's certainly unpleasant, but Maurdread has enough time to turn into the attack and greet the blow head-on. There's an almighty crash of weapon against weapon as the lower disc bites into the drum, leaving a gash in Maurdreads weapon and hurling both robots around the arena; the drumbot knocked to one side, the hovercraft pinballing around the entire box and almost totally out of control. Maurdread recovers and goes on the offensive again, catching up to Hovercrap and delivering another hit, this time well before either of the ring spinners can get up to speed. This finds a bit of purchase and sends the hovercraft tumbling through the air end over end. Hovercrap's self-righting pole just doesn't have the right geometry to put it back on its fee... whee... skir... to put it back the right way up, and the rings throw sparks up from the floor but don't, alas, bring any more success.

Winner: Maurdread, KO by Immobilization, 01:25

(6) Steelhead - Team Trihunter: 0-0 ~vs.~ (12) The HMS Bucolic - Angry Goat Robotics: 0-0

Written by The Monsterworks

The moment that the match starts, Bucolic's drill lets out a high-pitched whine and the entire ramshackle creation - a mass of whirring cogs and crudely-cut spars appearing as if it's held together by rope and prayer - rockets forward at unfathomable speeds. Lurking in the other starting square, all business, is the brutish-looking Steelhead. The Trihunter machine spins up its drum to a low hovering moan and moves forward with the simple goal of 'hit him head-on and flip him.'

Well, that ends up being easier said than done. The HMS Bucolic is not a sturdy vessel but, by Jove, she is a fast one! She also turns with all of the finesse and fine control of a hovercraft when at full speed. I swear, if this thing could spit out an anchor and use it to pull a Tokyo drift like they did in that Battleship movie with Rihanna, it would. What ensues is nearly a minute's worth of near misses, spin outs, and dramatic posturing. Both bots' engines roar and sputter, doing their best to spew out clouds of exhaust to make a truck driver blush. Steelhead leaps forward as it engages its clutch flipper, narrowly missing with a mighty heave. The American machine takes advantage of the momentary loss of control to slam, drill first, into its side. Precisely zero damage is done, but there are some nice sparks.

Using the drill as a fulcrum, Steelhead pivots and slips one of its flipping tusks beneath its opponent. The HMS Bucolic is already going full astern, trying to evade the attack, but it still - just - gets clipped, and that's surprisingly enough to knock it onto its side. The absurd contraption wallows around for a little while longer, one or two wheels on the floor at any given moment, before the referee decides that this doesn't constitute anything more than a rather amusing spectacle, and certainly not controlled translational movement. Steelhead celebrates by revving to full speed and leaping forward with another mighty flip. It was fun while it lasted!

Result: Steelhead wins by KO at 1:28

Round Two ICEcrown Fight Card, Standings, and Results

Posted: Thu Dec 06, 2018 10:19 am
by The Monsterworks
The Second Round

With the opening round in the bag, this tournament which - let's be honest - should probably never have been allowed to take place is well underway. Following a slight delay for the TO sneezing his goddamned brains out, it's time for the second round bracket. RPs will be due on Saturday, the 8th of December, at 11:59 PM EST. If you'd like to view the bracket and current standings, please, as always, refer to our Challonge page. Writing assignments are posted below and results will be added as they filter in. Good luck!

Second Round Matches

(1) Death's Head Sarsaparilla - The Monsterworks: 1-0 ~vs.~ (4) Labrys - Team Worst Swordsman: 1-0


The match begins with both bots approaching each other, but neither of them is fast enough to make any contact before they both reach full speed. when they are about to meet labrys stops and slowly reverses at DHS's speed, keeping a safe distance where her target is in the hammers's range but the full body spinner can't quite reach her.

Lesbianbot fires it's hammer and lands a very good hit that doesn't really accomplish much, and now Rocket realizes her mistake in her plan that The Monsterworks totally didn't predict. You see, when powerful hammers fire the entire bot tends to jump a little, a period where they don't really have any control, it's short but gives enough time to the retro-style pollution machine to close the small distance between the two, so...

Your winner, by knockout in 0:13, is Death's Head Sarsaparilla

(2) Detroit Iron - Tartarus Robotics Group: 1-0 ~vs.~ (5) Maurdread - Team Obscure: 1-0

Written by The Monsterworks

From the moment that the two drivers take their places in the control booths opposite each other, it's clear that there's mutual dislike in this fight, and not necessarily of the manufactured-for-TV variety, either. Bastien mutters something about Laz being a sweaty tryhard under his breath, but the sweaty tryhard's hearing is so keen that he picks up on it and taunts the Frenchman by calling him a 'croissant-eating surrender monkey'. The staredown is intense - so intense, in fact, that both drivers nearly forget to, you know, drive their bots.

Once he's done mean mugging, Laz is up to his usual shenanigans. Detroit Iron hurtles out of its starting square, engine wailing, and dodges the central hump at reckless levels of speed. Maurdread, for its part, is busy spinning up, sounding like a nest of angry hornets as exhaust pours out of its pipes. The French machine makes no concerted effort to evade a box rush, but it does try to create an angle by turning a bit, lifting one side slightly off the ground from the gyroscopic effect.

Well, Laz isn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth (though, IRL, he actually totally would), and Detroit Iron slams into its opponent with sickening force, plowing it into the arena wall. The drum, not quite at full tilt, throws up a magnificent shower of sparks off of the ironically Canadian entry's wedge, scoring it deeply but failing to penetrate. Laz keeps the throttle mashed, and his bot starts pushing Maurdread along a wall towards one of the corners. A fatale catches on one of the hoops protecting the spinner's gas tank, and flings it away, not dealing any discernible damage.

The blow isn't particularly powerful, but it has enough bite that Detroit Iron gets turned around as well, and Bastien uses the opportunity to get his bot free and get it up to speed. A raspy, keening death howl reverberates across the arena. Laz doesn't care. Detroit Iron comes in, presses and, despite Maurdread's attempts to create an angle, wedges it again, slamming it into a wall and shoving it back into the fatale from before, which has turned green, and demonstrates its newfound might by scuffing up some of the paint on the drum spinner's lower bodywork.

Whether by virtue of pressing and winning the wedge war or by taking advantage of ill-advised angling attempts, Detroit Iron wins the next couple of contacts. It squanders one by trying to maneuver Maurdread onto that same fatale from an awkward angle, letting the spinner slip away. However, a second attack succeeds, and a small chunk is torn from the Team Obscure machine's right wheel. The fatale is now up to orange, which is bad news for any bot that gets too brave with it, but Maurdread has bad news of its own. With the damage to its wheel, it's struggling to move as freely as it should.

Filled with confidence that the end is in sight, Laz guns Detroit Iron straight into it and eats a massive shot from the French machine's spinning drum. Hubris. It's bad. The Tartarus Robotics entry does a 580, landing upside-down, and its engine sputters unhappily a couple of times. The bigger issue is that its wedge is now the wrong way around. Bastien knows that too, and Maurdread goes on the offensive. For it's part, the Canadian machine isn't helpless. It still has a better drivetrain, and can press its wedge in reverse. The spinner doesn't seem particularly intent on scoring another meaty hit, though, perhaps wary of flipping its opponent back over. Running its weapon at partial power, it uses it as a traction-breaker, flicking Detroit Iron up and back and shunting it around the arena. The complexion of the fight has changed entirely! A particularly hard flip flings Detroit Iron backwards and nearly back over, and its wedge is looking pretty beat up at this point, but Maurdread resumes the onslaught and continues bullying its its opponent wherever it wants and... OH! TOWARDS THE FATALE!!

Sensing the danger at the last moment, Laz gets his bot out of there. A slower machine would've been toast. Seeing an open shot at an exposed side, Maurdread turns to re-engage, revving its drum up to full power, but this causes some pretty serious gyroscopic lift, and Detroit Iron, with ALL THE SPEED, is able to dig its battered, inverted wedge beneath the gap and actually somewhat catch the Team Obscure bot on the upside-down wedge edges. What a cruel turnabout. In what should've been its moment of triumph, Maudread gets fed into the hazard and one of its wheels just bites it. That's the left. Even worse.

The spinner can only move in occasional half-circles, and Laz has to know it. Timing his approach so that Detroit Iron can still gent beneath with its compromised wedge, he comes in and slams it into a wall. However, using gyroscopic effects to his advantage, for once, Bastien is able to squirm away before Maurdread can be fed to the deadly red fatale. Settling back onto its remaining wheel, it actually manages to catch one of the corners of Detroit Iron's plow, flinging the Canadian machine violently, but also righting it in the process. An attempt to follow up is stymied by its compromised mobility.

With only about thirty seconds remaining in the match, Maurdread is all-but finished, though Bastien's managing to crabwalk it enough with gyroscopic effects to avoid being counted out. That last hit also seems to have jammed Detroit Iron's wedge in the 'up' position, meaning that it can push, but it can't wedge. Again timing Maurdread's turns, it manages to get to its side and start pushing through sheer brute force. Again, the Team Obscure machine slips free, but this time, it's only a brief freedom, as Laz reestablishes control and high-centers his opponent's bot. With only seconds remaining, it's a straight shot onto the red fatale, which is going at murderous speed. It tears one of the sideguards and Maurdread's remaining wheel off, resetting to white as the buzzer sounds. What a fantastic contest between two very good machines. Lots of twists and turns and shifts of momentum. I thoink we'll be seeing a lot more of these two in the future but, for now, it's time for the judges to decide.

Aggression: 3-2 Maurdread
Damage: 3-2 Detroit Iron
Strategy: 3-2 Detroit Iron

Result: Detroit Iron wins an 8-7 judges' decision

(3) Steelhead - Team Trihunter: 1-0 ~vs.~ (6) Shellshock - Team Vertigo: 1-0

Written by Rocket

This really is a clash of two competing styles, with the all-out offence of a shell spinner going up against a flywheel flipper armoured like it's expecting to fight off a small army. It's also a clash of approaches towards each other, as evidenced when the battle kicks off. Steelhead bursts out of the starting square towards the left-hand side of the central pillar, while Shellshock is able to play keep-away long enough to get spun up. The two robots crash into each other, Shellshock leaving scrapes and dents in the flipper's arms as Trihunter slowly wears it down. Shellshock keeps trying to back off and keep spun up, and the noise of the Wankel engine is absolutely deafening, but the flipper sticks to the shellboi like glue and eventually gets that enormous titanium shell to stop moving. Steelhead's been spinning up its KE drum the whole time, and now that Shellshock is safely parked on its arms it finally triggers the clutch, flinging the superheavyweight machine a good five feet through the air. There's an enormous BANG as the now-spinning machine crashes into the ground and bounces off to one side, self-righting pole eventually doing its job and putting the shellboi back on its feet, but Steelhead is on the case and can close before Shellshock gets up to full speed. This time, Tri elects to ram the spinner into the wall, herding it with his twin flippers and getting it stopped. Then he fires the flippers again, and this time the bot bounces out of the arena.

Winner: Steelhead, KO by OOTA, 01:45

(7) Chernabog - Team Instant Regret: 0-1 ~vs.~ (12) The HMS Bucolic - Angry Goat Robotics: 0-1

Written by Wolf51-50 The Monsterworks

Well, from the moment that both bots start their engines and the buzzer sounds, this one's a shit show. Chernabog is laser-focused on keeping its wedge pointed at Bucolic with the end goal of crushing it, while the Angry Goat Robotics machine is equally obstinate about avoiding that wedge and certain death at all costs. What ensues is a waltz to the tune of Yakety Sax and it's largely inconclusive. Bucolic ends up smacking abortively into Chernabog at least a half dozen times, but is forced to peel off as the Team Instant Regret machine starts to bring its crusher around. On the other end of things, Chernabog tries to bite down just as many times, but just isn't able to come to grips with its absurdly quick opponent.

The complexion of the match finally changes at about the 1:20 mark, when a bit of oversteer actually helps The HMS Bucolic powerslide around the side of the big black crusher. Gabe jams the throttle forward and his bot slams into the side of its opponent's wedge, drill going at full tilt. Flecks of black paint litter the arena floor, becoming effectively invisible upon landing, and a small, squirrely groove is carved into the side of Chernabog. The bigger takeaway is that Bucolic finally succeeds in jamming that drill into one of the weight-saving holes of its opponent's weapon. There's more flying paint and sparks, and the impact, above Chernabog's center of gravity, tilts it to the side, breaking one of its wheels' contact with the arena floor.

For all its speed, the good ship Bucolic doesn't seem to have much in the way of pushing power, and Chernabog, like a trophy-sized pike on a hook, is doing everything it can to make Gabe's job even harder, moving its jaw up and down and using its one wheel in contact with the ground to squirm back and forth. Slowly, arduously, its exhausts and tires both belching smoke, The HMS Bucolic shoves the big black devil towards one of the fatales.

Pay dirt. With a slight 'clang', the hazard clips Chernabog's bodywork, freeing it and separating the two bots. However, in an incredibly improbable sequence, Gabe's bot ends up perfectly positioned to have another go at its side. HFL's not about to be hooked twice, however. He manages to turn his bot just enough that it's not a clean skewer, and he doesn't lose much more paint. The Bucolic is pushing again, though, making an unholy amount of smoke and noise, sprockets whirring, chains clattering. HFL's not about taking a second trip to that hazard, though. Immediately flexing Chernabog's claw back and forth, he manages to free it, and Gabe himself isn't a robot, so it takes him about half a second to react. That's all the time that his ramshackle creation needs to semi-strand itself at a weird angle on Cernabog's wedge, and down comes the mighty claw.

It's not a clean bite, but finally, after two minutes of futility, it's something. Now Chernabog has the wheels-on-the-ground advantage and, slowly, arduously, it pushes Bucolic towards a wall. Gabe tries to free his bot, but it's not quite enough and, with about twenty seconds left on the pin timer, Chernabog begins to operate. It's delicate going. The patient is far from fully anesthetized, but with less than ten seconds remaining, HFL's patience finally pays off, and the claw strikes home, crumpling through The HMS Bucolic's negligibly armoured engine housing. Suddenly, there's a loud pop and metal shards ping against the lexan. A fire breaks out amid the ruins of the Bucolic's engine block, spreading across the floor with the gasoline seeping from its ruptured tank. Chernabog releases its prey, backs off and takes a victory bow, black wings spread demonically against a backdrop of flames.

Result: Chernabog wins by KO at 2:34

(8) IMMA SCATMAN - End of the Line LLC.: 0-1 ~vs.~ (10) Taranis - Team British Robotics: 0-1

Written by Hooray For Lexan

Both of these bots are currently sitting at 0-1. For all intents and purposes this is IMMA Scatman’s first actually, since it didn’t actually work against Labrys. Its loss was embarassing, but on the other hand it’s avoided taking damage, compared to Taranis, which had a lot of work to do after getting dismantled by Death’s Head Sarsparilla. So, it’s like 50-50 on either of these bots being functional.

Fortunately, both bots do start up. A little smoke comes out of Taranis’s exhaust pipe as its disc revs up, while Imma Scatman’s chainsaw remains stationary as it charges out. It’s the first across the middle of the arena, dodging the center nail, and Taranis has to back off to get up to full speed unmolested. Both machines jockey for position, and as Taranis tips sideways Imma Scatman gets under the raised side and shoves it into the wall. Taranis buzzes angrily, but it can’t make contact, and it’s pinned until IS has to let it go. However, Taranis has no interest in running away. As IS backs off it charges forward, making definitive contact with IS’s dustpan. Imma Scatman is tossed away, but doesn’t go over. It darts back in and tries to turn to hit the inner side of Taranis’s front wedgelets, but ends up just coming it at an angle where its own side pontoon goes between them and gets clipped by Taranis’s disc.

Taranis is barely spinning now, though, and Imma Scatman gets under it again and shoves it into one of the Fatales. IS also decides to smack its chainsaw against the floor for some reason, which makes a few sparks and messes up the nice black paint on the floor panel, but otherwise accomplishes nothing. Taranis is knocked free by the hazard, and has to run away, dodging away from another attack by IS as it spins back up. But once the disc is going it’s back on the attack, getting another solid hit on Imma Scatman’s wedge, and this time Imma Scatman gets flipped!

Imma Scatman is invertable, but it won’t have the range to use the chainsaw quite as effectively when inverted. But more to the point, that dustpan – now just a wedge because the bot’s upside-down – is NOT flush with the floor. Taranis’s hits have curled pieces up, and they’re holding the wedge off the ground! Imma Scatman retreats, ducking behind the center nail and starting the process of self-righting, but while it does so the chainsaw holds its wheels in the air, and Taranis comes in for another attack! Imma Scatman turns just in time to take the hit on its pontoon, but the sides of those were never flush with the ground, and it takes another big hit that throws it 540 degrees. This time the chainsaw’s in a position where it can easily self-right, though, and Taranis’s attempt at a followup hit is at low speed, and just pops it back a little in addition to stalling Taranis’s weapon. Imma Scatman takes it to the Fatales again – unfortunately it’s another white one – but in the meantime Taranis restarts its engine, and before long it manages to get another hit!

BANG! Imma Scatman goes flying upside-down again and lands on the center nail. It’s able to wiggle free, but as it tries to self-right Taranis attacks it from behind! It doesn’t look like that hit did much damage to IS’s body, but I saw something fly off – wait, there’s what happened, the chain’s come off of Imma Scatman’s saw and the saw frame is bent a bit.

Undeterred by the damage, Imma Scatman manages to angle in on Taranis again and get another pin, but again Taranis is able to spin its weapon up without it touching anything, and moves aggressively as soon as it’s released. Another big hit bends IS’s dustpan up further, and by now it’s having trouble getting under Taranis even when it comes in at a favorable angle and avoids the lowest parts of its forks. It gets Taranis’s disc to stop one more time, but it’s having a lot more trouble controlling the match, and gets tossed around a lot more and has serious chunks taken out of the dustpan before the match is over.

Judges’ Decision:

Damage: Taranis 5, IMMA Scatman 0
Aggression: Taranis 3, IMMA Scatman 2
Strategy: Taranis 2, IMMA Scatman 3

Your winner, by a 10-5 Judges’ Decision, is Taranis!

(9) Hovercrap - Team Design Flaw: 0-1 ~vs.~ (11) Screamroller - Aquatic Robotics: 0-1

Written by The_Angry_Goat Hooray For Lexan

This is a real battle of low tech vs. high tech here. Hovercrap has counter-rotating ring spinners and a friggin’ air cushion powered by a miniature V8 engine, whereas Screamroller has… what looks to be a lawnmower engine spinning a big metal pipe with weights attached to it by bits of chain. Bit of trivia, both of these machines lost their first match by getting stuck upside-down.

Anyway, both bots spin up their weapons with a roar. Hovercrap’s props are immediately spinning, but it doesn’t really get going until its engine revs up enough to get that air cushion working, at which point it drifts out of its starting square and towards the arena center. Screamroller’s not the quickest either though, and it doesn’t seem interested in rushing in. The drum spinner carefully lines up, and comes in… WHAM.

The first hit’s actually kind of underwhelming. Shrapnel goes flying everywhere, and Hovercrap glides away at high speed, bouncing off the center nail and running into the wall before it can get back under control. It’s like watching a melty fight but in slow motion. Meanwhile Screamroller is vibrating a bit, and the whole robot is bouncing back and forth on those springy support arms, with it periodically throwing sparks off the arena floor.

Hovercrap manages to get back up to speed as Screamroller comes after it again, and rapidly spins ninety degrees to the right just as Screamroller charges in. This time there’s a much bigger hit, and both robots go flying! Hovercrap hits the wall again, briefly stopping its rings. Screamroller gets spun around and almost flipped over, and the drum grinds to a halt. All but one of the flails is gone, there’s a huge gash in the side of the drum, the support frame’s bent outward on the right side, the shaft’s come out of its mounts on the right side, and the chain’s derailed. Now that’s a lotta damage! But it looks like Hovercrap’s got some problems as well! It looks like part of the support structure for the top ring has gotten bent upward. It starts to spin up again, but uhh, only the lower ring is working. And that’s a problem, because the props don’t have enough thrust to counteract the torque of spinning up. Its chassis starts spinning out of control like a helicopter with no tail rotor.

So now we have one robot with no weapon, and one robot that’s, uhh, gone melty mode. Hovercrap is sort of drifting in Screamroller’s direction. Is it actually controlled translation? Who knows? Screamroller seems to think so, and it cautiously approaches, keeping the broken drum in front of it as a shield. Hovercrap tears off Screamroller’s right support wheel and even snaps the spring steel arm supporting it in half, but the impact sends it drifting out of control across the arena. Slowly… inevitably… into the corner, and a Fatale. This brings the hoverbot to an abrupt halt when it spins its own skirt into the Fatale’s tooth at high speed, tearing it wide open and leaving it stuck on the hazard getting slowly spun around. Uhh… normally this would be an unstuck, but I think it’s pretty obvious what’s going to happen after that: Hovercrap won’t hover.

Your winner, by knockout in 1:09, is Screamroller!

Refer to the opening post for rules and arena details. Let's get those RPs in and keep this thing moving!

Re: ICEcrown Fight Card, Standings, and Results

Posted: Tue Dec 11, 2018 11:19 am
by The Monsterworks
The Third Round

Two rounds down and it starting to get serious. There are already a couple of early favourites who really can't afford another loss. If you think about it, after this round, we'll be halfway through! I'd be loathe to hold that particular freight train up, so without further ado, it's time for the third round bracket. RPs will be due on Saturday, the 15th of December, at 11:59 PM EST. If you'd like to view the bracket and current standings, please, as always, refer to our Challonge page. Writing assignments are posted below and results will be added as they filter in. Good luck!

Third Round Matches

(1) Death's Head Sarsaparilla - The Monsterworks: 2-0 ~vs.~ (3) Detroit Iron - Tartarus Robotics Group: 2-0

Written by Rocket

Detroit Iron's not a damaging machine, but it does have access to some damage potential - namely, the Discs Of Doom in the corners of the arena. So, when the battle starts (and to DHS's mild bewilderment), Laz pilots his machine straight into the disc to the left of his starting square. Then he shoves it in again, and again, until the thing turns orange and is spinning up rather unpleasantly. DHS is still trundling over at a speed somewhere between "snail" and "arthritic glacier", but it has to change direction as Detroit Iron abruptly about faces and feeds its wedge into the disc on the right-hand side of his starting square. Realizing what's going on, DHS tries to intercept, but Laz is easily able to dodge past the slower machine (remaining well outside of turret range) and... feed his wedge into even more hazards. The judges are looking at one another like "can we give negative scores for aggression?", but Laz remains oblivious. This time, DHS knows there's only one hazard left to go, and has made its slow-ass way towards it. This time, it's close enough, essentially acting like a hazard itself. Probably one of the pulverizers, only it, y'know, does something. Laz drives around it easily and lights up the final disc, but in so doing DHS has managed to get behind him!

The hammer drops and delivers a thumping great strike to the left-hand side of Detroit Iron, just missing the tracks but buckling the frame and making two of the exhaust pipes start grinding against the rollers. Laz then tries a different tack as DHS spins its flywheel up again; it backs up and rockets towards the hammerbot in its first piece of genuine aggression in the whole damned match. Its wedge is low and easily gets under DHS, but it receives another crashing blow to its left-hand side for its pains. This one manages to smack the left track itself, throwing bits of tread everywhere as DHS leaps off the wedge from the force of its own weapon. It bounces to one side, managing to stay on its feet, but Detroit Iron felt that one. The track is in disarray, and the robot's struggling to move at anything like its normal speed with only half its drive working. Laz tries something else again, raising his lifter to act as a hammer blocker, but the bigtime hammer drops once more before it can get into position, this time coming down at a slightly different angle and marmalizing the back axle. Its pushing power now greatly reduced, but Laz has three seconds to work with where he can't get pounded even more, and now his hammer blocker IS in position. He drives forward, gunning the engine as hard as he can, trying to correct the drive's newfound weirdness as he clashes with the hammerbot. He takes another hit to the tracks, this time to the right, but the impact is lessened by his own wedge as he pushes the enemy towards the closest orange hazard. The hammer keeps hitting him, though, and each blow loosens things in the track assembly. Finally, though, it reaches the orange goal and the hazard chews into the underside of DHS, tearing up its wheels, but not before one last blow smashes the absolute buggery out of the track and all but immobilizes Detroit Iron completely.

The force of the hazard's spin flings DHS off to one side, but now? Now it has a stationary target. Detroit Iron tries to turn, and it's got plenty of time, but DHS smashes its hammer down again and again. Finally, something dies inside Detroit Iron, and the refs count it out.

Winner: Death's Head Sarsaparilla, KO by Immobilization, 02:16

(2) Steelhead - Team Trihunter: 2-0 ~vs.~ (5) Chernabog - Team Instant Regret: 1-1

Written by The_Angry_Goat

Fuck I got chernabog again, and tri’s thing that I can’t actually see because he uses discord image links. Ah well I remember pretty well what it looked like so we’ll just go with it.

So the deciding factor in this thing is wedge shape – by and large, chernabog fits pretty neatly in between Steelhead’s front wedges, and steelhead really doesn’t have the maneuverability advantage to overcome this. this leads to an unfortunate snowball, as chernabog is able to pretty consistently able to bring Steelhead to the same hazard over the course of the match and eventually rips off both its back wheels in the last few seconds. Steelhead does get in a few good flips at about the midpoint of the match, where he’s able to dramatically shift the battle into his favor for about a minute, exploiting chernabog’s slowish self-righting system. but once HFL regains upright-ness, he’s back at it again with the clamping directly into Tri’s weapon power source and making it unusable so he can’t even escape.

Aggression: 3-2 Steelhead
Damage: 4-1 Chernabog
Control: 3-2 Chernabog

Chernabog wins a 9-6 judges' decision!

(4) Shellshock - Team Vertigo: 1-1 ~vs.~ (8) Labrys - Team Worst Swordsman: 1-1


We got a fight between two bots that currently sit at 1-1. One lost by OOTA and the other by getting destroyed in a few seconds by a Full body Spinner, and guess who is it's next opponent: Another Full body Spinner.

It can be clearly seen that one of the drivers is significantly more nervous than the other.

Anyways, when the lights turn green both bots approach each other, neither is close to being fast so they both get their respective weapons up to full speed before they meet. When they finally get close Labrys reverses and fires it's hammer, but she misses. She keeps reversing at Shellshock's speed and then fires again, this time landing a hit that accomplishes NOTHING, they continue this chase and this time Labrys lands a much better shot that that pushes Shellshock away and actually destabilizes it. Rocket sees this and rockets her bot at the slippery FBS to hit him with her more powerful disk. did this work? Well this time she got the short end of the stick and it's Shellshock the one that lands a decent hit on his opponents disk. Both get thrown away, Shellshock bounces on a corner and comes back, turning green one of the fatales.

They both recover from the hit and go back to their respective game plan, at their next encounter Shellshock manages to catch and tear off one of Labriys's wedgelets, while the one with the hammer uses said hammer to land another hit that does nothing but push her both bots apart from each other. after a bit of the same chase and not exactly good hits Labrys manages to land another hammer hit that destabilizes the FBS. She of course charges again but this time she is the one that lands a hit that throws Shellshock in to the air, when it lands it bouces a few times so the lesbian bot naturally goes for a followup attack. This time a much more interesting hit happens, both get thrown far away, the dorito-powered spinner goes airborne again and bounces against the lexan wall. The disk on labrys seems a bit damaged but it still works so they go back to the same game. But now, when Labrys uses it's hammer, the driver fired early and her weapon hits the floor, giving the slippery spinner a chance to hit her.

Noisey takes that chance and lands a devastating blow, the hammer get's torn off entirely and the axle on the disk gets bent, so it's also dead, and Sheelshock bonces against two walls to recover control near the place the hit took place.

The only thing that the now weaponless vert/hammer can do now is make an Detroit Iron impersonation. Did she pull it of? maybe, for a few seconds perhaps but that spinner is too much for it's chassis to handle and her drive dies after a few hits.
Meaning that she gets counted-out.

Meaning that Shellshock wins by KO at 2:37

(6) Maurdread - Team Obscure: 1-1 ~vs.~ (10) IMMA SCATMAN - End of the Line LLC.: 0-2

Written by The Monsterworks

These bots have taken very different paths to this juncture. Scatman, a pre-tournament favourite, failed to start in its opening match against Labrys, suffering an embarrassing loss, and things only got worse against the vertical spinner Taranis, where it was decisively outpointed in a judges' decision despite having what most would consider a design edge. Meanwhile, coming in with the eleventh seed and largely dismissed by prognosticators, Maurdread opened with an upset win over the highly rated Hovercrap before giving the mighty Detroit Iron all it could handle in losing a razor-thin judges' decision. One of these bots is looking for redemption. The other has a chance to move into the upper echelons of the bracket.

At the start of the match, IMMA SCATMAN rockets across the arena, dodging the central hump, and plows straight into Maurdread, which isn't quite up to full speed. WOW, now that's a box rush. Unfortunately for the End of the Line LLC. machine, it wheelies just the slightest bit, and Maurdread's drum sends it somersaulting end over end. The force of the impact sends the French entry's drum into low revs, so it can't really follow up like Bastien had undoubtedly wanted, but the massive flip does give it time to dodge away until its engine is back into its power band. A keening wail reverberates through the arena. Exhaust pours out through the haphazardly-placed pipes in Maurdread's chassis.

Scatman approaches with a bit more caution this time and, at the last moment, it hooks to the side trying to force its opponent to turn and go into a gyro spin while trying to keep up. Bastien's not falling for it. He backs up and Scatman is caught out, presenting its corner - and nearly its side - to the Team Obscure machine. Noah's bot starts to pivot away as Maurdread charges, but then halfway through, it drifts to a stop, the rattly wheeze of its chainsaw motor still going, but its drive apparently dead. Never one to look a gift horse in the mouth, Bastien plows his robot - drum howling at full speed - into the left wheel of IMMA SCATMAN.

The American machine achieves liftoff again, doing a magnificent 540 degree barrel roll. Bits of shredded tire and shards of metal spray across the arena, and SCATMAN comes to rest upside-down near one of the hazards. It promptly self-rights, but trying to scoot forward using its chainsaw does not constitute controlled movement, Noah. The judges count it out and Maurdread moves up the bracket with another strong showing against a pre-tournament favourite.

Result: (6) Maurdread wins by KO (FF) at 0:59

(7) Screamroller - Aquatic Robotics: 1-1 ~vs.~ (9) Taranis - Team British Robotics: 1-1

Written by Hooray For Lexan

It’s a battle of the vertical spinners here! Both machines spin their weapons up with a loud roar that mixes with the death hums the weapons already create just from displacing so much air. Screamroller advances fairly cautiously, but Taranis is much more aggressively, swerving past Screamroller and trying to get to its sides. Screamroller turns that huge drum around, and while it’s slightly the slower of the two machines it easily keeps pace. Taranis speeds away, Screamroller pursues at a leisurely pace. Taranis turns around and makes another go at Screamroller’s side – the left one this time – but again it’s kept at bay by Screamroller’s flails. It doesn’t look like TBR wants to risk a head-on collision here.

But the problem with Taranis’s actual plan of attack is that doesn’t leave much room for error. If it can’t get to Screamroller’s wheels, but overcommits and isn’t able to avoid Screamroller’s weapon, it could be in trouble – and that’s just what happens on the next attempt as Screamroller lunges forward, and the two robots collide in a shower of sparks and shrapnel. Taranis goes skidding away, spinning in circles – and there’s a wheel gone! Taranis’s left wheel is torn off, and the left front panel’s got a huge gash in it as well. Taranis’s mobility is seriously compromised now, and it accidentally flips itself over with gyroscopic forces, then back upright. It can’t really do anything but keep its weapon in front of it to threaten Screamroller now. The fight has, err, sort of reversed. Now it’s Screamroller trying to get around Taranis’s other side to get the remaining wheel, and Taranis forced onto the defensive. Eventually, they meet weapon-to-weapon, but the longer reach of Screamroller’s weapon is more than enough to hit Taranis’s supports. Screamroller gets tossed backward and almost flipped on its head, but the protective armor panel on the right weapon support is completely caved in and ripped open. Taranis’s drum grinds to a halt, and another glancing blow hits the already damaged left side. There’s something leaking out onto the arena floor from Taranis, and the fight has to be stopped because we don’t want a burning oil slick. Team TBR surrenders during the time-out.

Your winner, by knockout in 1:41, is Screamroller!

(11) Hovercrap - Team Design Flaw: 0-2 ~vs.~ (12) The HMS Bucolic - Angry Goat Robotics: 0-2

Written by The Monsterworks

Someone's '0' has got to go! Both teams go into the fight knowing that the winner will still have a reasonable chance of qualifying for the playoffs, while the loser will almost certainly be out. You can just see the focus in Gabe's eyes as he saunters up tot he control booth. They're so intense that they're red and bloodshot. Whoa! He's staring at the bright lights, just waiting for them to turn green. His focus and intensity are amazing. His opponent with the unpronounceable name can't hope to match that sort of burning intensity, but he looks calm and focused in his own right, like a man with a plan.

The Noir darkens, living up to its name. Strobe lights rove across the arena floor. The backlighted floor panels glow in the blackness. Red, gold, and then green strobe and the lights return. Engine roaring, The HMS Bucolic rockets forward like a 1969 Hemi 'Cuda at the drag strip. It takes Hovercrap a moment to rise from the arena floor. By the time that it's starting to, the Angry Goat machine is already around the central hump and charging at it like Cruella De Vil in her Duesenberg during the climactic chase scene of 101 Dalmations.

The Argentinian entry barely manages to rise onto its air cushion by the time that the enemy is upon it, and its attempt to dodge is less than successful. The two machines collide, with Bucolic's drill shaving mere millimeters - if that - above the deadly counter-rotating blades of its opponent. It slams into the hovercraft's chassis at full tilt, gouging a slight furrow and sending paint and sparks across the arena. Hovercrap rebounds into the wall and, when its blades strike the barrier, it begins its customary pinball dance, clipping Bucolic as it goes. The much-diminished impact still does considerable damage, tearing the American entry's right front wheel away.

Between the damage to The HMS Bucolic and the sheer unpredictability of Hovercrap, the Team Design Flaw entry is able to get up to speed, its miniature V8 engine and those two absolutely psycho blades screaming at power levels well over 9000. From the opposite control booth, Gabe can be heard to shout, "witness me!!!" as the Bucolic hurtles towards certain death, gimpy wheel and all. The result most certainly earns him a place in Valhalla. The drill is ripped clean off and the entire frame around it bent and twisted. Still spinning at full speed, it rockets into the lexan and impacts with enough force to rock the arena. It ricochets away and comes to rest beside the desiccated remains of the bot from whence it came. For its part, Hovercrap pinballs around for nearly the next twenty seconds, entirely out of control, before finally brought to heel and declared the victor.

Result: (11) Hovercrap wins by Witness Me!!! KO at 0:56

Refer to the opening post for rules and arena details. Let's get those RPs in and keep this thing moving!

ICEcrown Fight Card, Standings, and Results Round Four

Posted: Mon Dec 17, 2018 1:38 am
by The Monsterworks
The Fourth Round

"Mommy, are we there yet!?"

Well, no, but at least I can finally say that we're halfway, and what an unpredictable ride it's been so far! Favourites have fallen at an alarming rate. While some have picked themselves back up, some haven't. Darkhorses and longshots have risen from obscurity. Can they continue their surprising runs or will the ruthless matching algorithms of a Swiss bracket prove too much for them? There's only one way to find out, so without further ado, it's time to roll out the third round bracket. RPs will be due on Saturday, the 22nd of December, at 11:59 PM EST. If you'd like to view the bracket and current standings, please, as always, refer to our Challonge page. Writing assignments are posted below and results will be added as they filter in. Good luck!

Fourth Round Matches

(1) Death's Head Sarsaparilla - The Monsterworks: 3-0 ~vs.~ (5) Shellshock - Team Vertigo: 2-1

Written by Rocket

This is very much a tale of two strategies, as evidenced by the roar of the two bots' respective engines when the battle starts. DHS takes a line towards the central hump, spinning up as it goes, while Shellshock is content to hang back and get the dangerous shell up to speed. DHS is cagey, but Shellshock unleashes a charge at the more cautious machine, the battle cry of its rotary engine rendered only slightly hilarious by the fact that its charging really ought to be referred to as "slightly faster trundling than normal". Force just waits, staying spun up, until the last possible moment, at which point he jinks elegantly to the left. Shellshock crashes into the central hump, bouncing away from it, and is slowed down... and then DHS goes in for the kill, slamming into the blue spinner with all its might. The two robots are flung apart, DHS sporting a new scar but Shellshock looking far more the worse for wear, not least because it ended up being bounced quite a lot further than its crimson counterpart. DHS takes the opportunity to get aggressive, spinning back up as it drives towards the slightly stricken Shellshock, but Noisey screams a challenge and countercharges. Countertrundles. Whatever. In any event, both robots are spun up to full when they impact, and OH MY GOD! This time they're flung all over the place! Shellshock did manage to get a hit on DHS's bolted tooth mount, but it came at a price as something silver flies right off the blue shell's, er, blue shell! Noisey's staying spun up, but the tooth being knocked off has destabilized the shell, and it's Maulerdancing all around the arena! Finally it comes to rest on its side, engine stalled out from repeatedly smashing into the floor and being brutalized by DHS. Cease is called and the Monsterworks continues its unbeaten run.

Winner: DHS, KO by Immobilization, 01:15

(2) Detroit Iron - Tartarus Robotics Group: 2-1 ~vs.~ (4) Chernabog - Team Instant Regret: 2-1


We got a fight between two bots that currently sit at 2-1: A boring brick lifting wedge in the red square and a crusher in the blue one.

When the lights turn green both bots get out of their squares immediately, like two seconds later they are now close to each other and DI starts driving erratically towards chernabog's sides, messing with hfl as he tries to keep his front facing Detroit Iron. After a few more seconds Laz says enough and charges, angling in at the last second, managing to out wedge one of Chernabog's skids. hfl tries to J-turn away but he can't escape the wedge of his way faster opponent, said opponent pushes Chernabog to the wall and uses it's lifting wedge to slowly turn it on it's side and then push it to the closest fatale before it can self right.

After that chernabog escapes the corner and runs away, but Detroit Iron says nope and goes after him and pushes him from the back, only for Chernabog to fall off almost instantly. Naturally DI turns around and charges again, but in the time that takes action, hfl also turns around to encounter Laz face to face.

This time Chernabog is the one that outwedges, but can't out push it's opponent, heck, Detroit Iron is the one pushing right now, slowly but surely, and guess where they are heading. Straight at the now green fatale. meanwhile Chernabog can't control the fight but what he can and does is use his weapon to make a hole on DI top armor. He keeps crushing as they reach the fatale that does little to no damage to his wheels.

Eventually hfl has to release DI and they have to get off the now yellow fatale for it to be activated again.
they get away from each other and then they charge at each other again. Now Detroit Iron manages to successfully angle in again and the start of the match gets repeated but now with a yellow fatale that scrapes off the tips of one of Chernabog's srimech wings and a little peace of it's wheel.

DI can't keep it forever so eventually Chernabog gets away, hfl knows that laz will follow him so he quickly turns 180° to encounter the brick face to face. half a second later they encounter and the crusher is the one that outwedges it's opponent, DI rides up that wedge and Chernabogs engine goes at full tilt as the crusher makes another hole on DI's top.

Hfl raises it's claw, trying and failing to lift Detroit Iron, but by the time Laz realizes what going on the claw is already making another hole.

You know why he didn't realize that? Because he was too focused on driving them to the now orange fatale, and he was succeeding at that.

When they are getting close to the fatale Team Instant Regret's captain tries again to lift DI now with a better grip on it as a last resort action as he sees his bot slowly approach it's doom. Did he succeed now? N O P E

Detroit Iron finally pushes Chernabog to the orange fatale, witch destroys one off it's wheels and cut's off a large chunk of the other, Detroit Iron does some stunts with it's somewhat damaged lifter in the middle of the arena as Chernabog gets counted-out.

Result: Detroit Iron wins by KO in 2:07

(3) Steelhead - Team Trihunter: 2-1 ~vs.~ (10) Taranis - Team British Robotics: 1-2

Written by Hooray For Lexan

Both robots come out aggressively, with Taranis’s drisc and Steelhead’s flywheel getting up to full speed as they jockey for position. Steelhead rushes in and gets one of its flipper prongs between Taranis’s forks. Sparks fly as Taranis’s weapon makes contact with the prong, though. Taranis sends itself skidding backwards to freedom before Steelhead can flip it, but the hit didn’t do any real damage to Steelhead’s weapon either. So far a stalemate.

Taranis wastes no time in putting the pressure right back on its opponent, and this time gets under it. The upper part of its wedges is too steep for it to push further under though, and for a moment the bots have horns locked and tires spinning with Taranis unable to either reach Steelhead’s wedge or push it back. It finally manages to turn sideways and clip Steelhead’s left flipper prong. Steelhead turns up on its side and almost on its back.

A couple more glancing blows, and Taranis gets a solid hit on the right flipper prong, tossing Steelhead in the air. The tail provides a little springiness to keep it from getting flipped over, but it comes down on top of Taranis. The drisc comes to a stop, but Taranis pushes Steelhead into the center nail. It knocks itself free with the flipper, and both robots back off a little to get back up to speed… or do they? Steelhead rushes in again without its weapon at full speed and is able to get under Taranis at an angle! It flips – it’s anemic compared to Steelhead’s normal launches, but it’s enough to flip Taranis over backwards!

Taranis’s disc hits the ground a low speed, knocking it into an inverted position. It tries to drive forward on its top rollers, and almost immediately proceeds to flop forward and do the thing. Its weapon comes to a stop. The engine’s still running because centrifugal clutch, but it’s at idle and doesn’t have enough torque to pop Taranis out of that position. There’s goes the count-out!

Your winner, by knockout in 1:25, is Steelhead!

(6) Maurdread - Team Obscure: 2-1 ~vs.~ (7) Screamroller - Aquatic Robotics: 2-1

Written by The_Angry_Goat

So this is the first time I’ve actually seen Maudread because discord image links and all and holy fuck what is that shape.

It’s so Oblong....

Anywho they’re off and it seems like Maudread’s aggression has forced screamroller into eating a head-on collision. Normally this would be heavily in the favor of the frog, since his reach is so much better. Problem is the drum’s a bunch of upwards spinning chains, so they really just kinda grind up the angled front of Maudread, leaving some nice scrapes, but don’t affect the weapon of maudread that much. Maud, on the other hand gets in a vicious uppercut when it impacts screamroller’s drum. The impact of this hit raises maudred off the ground, which in turn allows screamroller’s flails to catch on the underside of maudred’s wedge, majorly deforming it. All of that happened in like, a second. And that one hit is all that’s notable about the fight. After it, screamroller’s weapon does the death wobble (probably because of the giant dent in it), but Maudread is stranded on its own front, its complete lack of ground clearance coming back to bite it.

Your winner, by KO in 0:22, is Screamroller!

(8) Hovercrap - Team Design Flaw: 1-2 ~vs.~ (9) Labrys - Team Worst Swordsman: 1-2

Written by Wolf51-50 The Monsterworks

I'd love to tell you about how Labrys pulled off its precision gambit beautifully, scoring an unlikely win and vaulting itself back into contention. It's a unique and cool design not unlike some of my own. Unfortunately, that doesn't happen here because the decision in this fight comes down to margin of error. Simply put, with its low armour value and the precision and timing needed to land exactly the right blow, it has very little. Meanwhile, Hovercrap, which more or less has to just "SMASH" in spite of the over-the-limit 488 word essay written by its driver, has a lot more room. Incidentally, the 400 word limit, which has been tested by a handful of people over the course of the tournament so far will be strictly enforced from here on out. 401 words = DQ. You have been warned.

Anyways, back to this right old dust up. What more or less happens is that Labrys comes out and lands a brilliant axe blow right where it intended. That forces Hovercrap into the ground and chaos ensues. It also cleanly amputates the poor lesbian's axe, and what is a lesbian without an axe, really? Labrys attempts valiantly to follow up with its disc, but has neither the drivetrain nor design to convincingly do so (the disc is too damn high!). The Argentinian machine pinballs around the arena for about twenty seconds, an enraged, axeless lesbian in hot pursuit, before regaining its bearings and simply fleeing to get its weaponry up to speed. The next contact between the two bots is...I'l spare the details, but let's just say that Labrys is, sadly, not moving afterwards.

Result: Hovercrap wins by KO at 1:02!

(11) The HMS Bucolic - Angry Goat Robotics: 0-3 ~vs.~ (12) IMMA SCATMAN - End of the Line LLC.: 0-3

Written by The Monsterworks

Wow, this is just a humdinger of a fight right from the start. The HMS Bucolic comes out full ahead, with its characteristic show of blazing speed, and crashes full-on into SCATMAN. Its drill contacts the End of the Line LLC machine's saw, there are sparks and, as it begins to be pushed backwards, it jackknifes. Noah drives forward aggressively, catching Bucolic in his bot's dustpan. Quickly, he lifts the saw up and attempts to clamp, but Gabe's already backing out, using his bot's high ground clearance. As the saw comes down to clamp, he decides to do something brilliant, crazy, and highly unlikely to work, charging forward and getting the tip of his drill jammed in his opponent's saw mechanism.

It works. The madman. The absolute madman.

There's a terrific shower of sparks and then, with a puff of smoke, the saw's traction belt flies clean off, snagging on its lifting mechanism and trailing limply on the ground. The two bots continue their fast-paced duel, maneuvering frantically for the next minute or so, with SCATMAN coming out on top more often than not. Bucolic gets fed to the hazards a couple of times but, on one delivery, Noah's machine gets jolted back and spun partway around. Suddenly, it isn't moving! It's trying, but it seems to be high-centered on its own weapon conveyor! Gabe, gunning The HMS Bucolic into its stricken opponent, steers hard a port, avoiding a collision by centimeters. Not one to look a gift horse in the mouth, he hangs back, his bot doing a victory dance - likely its only one of the event - in the center of the arena as IMMA SCATMAN is counted out, reaching new heights of ignominy.

Result: The HMS Bucolic wins by KO (FF) at 1:48

Refer to the opening post for rules and arena details. Let's get those RPs in and keep this thing moving!

Round Five ICEcrown Fight Card, Standings, and Results

Posted: Fri Dec 28, 2018 1:35 am
by The Monsterworks
The Fifth Round

"And he, he himself... the Grinch, carved the roast beast..."

After a bit of a holiday hangover and food coma, it's time to roll out the penultimate qualifying round. With a logjam of bots at 2-2, these final two rounds will separate the naughty from the nice. We've already witnessed our share of spectacular failures and successes, controversial decisions, scintillating knockouts, and inspired (and less-than-inspired) driving. Does this tournament have at least a couple more surprises in store before the qualifying rounds conclude? Well, you'll have to RP to find out, and you don't have much time! RPs will be due on Saturday, the 29th of December, at 11:59 PM EST. If you'd like to view the bracket and current standings, please, as always, refer to our Challonge page. Writing assignments are posted below and results will be added as they filter in. Good luck!

Fifth Round Matches

(1) Death's Head Sarsaparilla - The Monsterworks: 4-0 ~vs.~ (11) The HMS Bucolic - Angry Goat Robotics: 1-3

Written by Wolf51-50

HMS rushes into the fight quickly. Death's Head Sarsaparilla finds a hidden spring in the floor and flies upward and sideways. It hits HMS Bucolic twice on the top. HMS doesn't have a real strategy. It just runs back and forth with the drill going. DHS is back on it's wheels and gives it a smack on one of the sides. That hit must have loosened something on the weapon. The drill spits itself out of the robot and gets knocked away by the shell of DHS. DHS gets one more hit that causes all of the wheels on HMS Bucolic to fall off. Mini Gabe pops out of the robot and flies away.

Death's Head Sarsaparilla wins by KO in 0:24

(2) Detroit Iron - Tartarus Robotics Group: 3-1 ~vs.~ (8) Hovercrap - Team Design Flaw: 2-2

Written by The_Angry_Goat

So the most effective way to run away from an opponent is to go the opposite way around the nail that they try to go, right? That’s certainly what hovercrap seems to have tried to do, but he ended up going the same direction as DI did, so he has to go for plan B and just stall for as much time as possible. He doesn’t quite get up to speed, but it’s pretty close all things considered. Hovercrap coins wildly as the two collide, the impact sending it in a majestic arc over one of the floor hazards, into another wall, and then sliding out towards the center of the arena, where Detroit Iron catches back up with it, and the bullying begins, as Detroit Iron eats another few hits, each receding in intensity as it slowly backs hovercrap into a corner.

The problem here is that hovercrap is a deathspinner with absolutely no quick escape potential. Even when Laz is forced to un-pin the bot, its hovercraft system disallows any quick reactive escape, especially since the machine relies on the spinners being up to speed to steer. This means that over the course of the next minute or so, Laz just shoves the shell spinner onto one of the floor hazards repeatedly until the hazard does its auto KO damage and just kills him. Fair and balanced hazards BTW.

Your winner, by KO in 1:33, is Detroit Iron!

(3) Screamroller - Aquatic Robotics: 3-1 ~vs.~ (10) Labrys - Team Worst Swordsman: 1-3


Both bots get out of their starting squares and charge at each other, only for Labrys to stop like 2 seconds later. Meanwhile the aquatic robotics entry keeps charging and when they are close to each other Labrys quickly reverses and turns away, facing her opponent's right side. Of course she immediately fires her hammer and lands a hit on the edge off Screamroller drum, BUT said drum has flails on it, flails that kept spinning, hitting the side of that axe, tearing it off completely.

After that Labrys backs away, probably to think off a new plan, and not much happens for then next 20 seconds or so until she decides to just charge in. Seconds later Labrys land a decent hit on screamrollers drum and immediately after it's flails hit Labrys's disk.
Then they back away to spin up and then charge again, but now screamroller is the one that lands a hit on Labrys's disk before her, the flails make repeated hits that make the lesbian bot hop a little but she keeps coming at it until she finally reaches that drum and lands a big hit that actually flips Screamroller.

Screamroller literally can't do anything while upside-down so it gets counted out while Rocket and her badly damaged bot celebrate the upset(?) that she just barely pulled off.

Result: Labrys wins by KO in 1:32

(4) Steelhead - Team Trihunter: 3-1 ~vs.~ (12) IMMA SCATMAN - End of the Line LLC.: 0-4

Written by The Monsterworks

Swiss style brackets are weird. It's my tournament and it was my decision to run it this way, but I'll be the first to admit that not exactly all of the matches this round have been...dynamite. Steelhead, at 3-1, has performed every bit as well as expected and possibly better, with a playoff spot all-but guaranteed unless it manages to lose both of its last two matches and some other bots score unexpected wins. Meanwhile, pre-tournament favourite IMMA SCATMAN has been an utter flop, suffering from serious mechanical issues in three of its four fights and being soundly outpointed by the underwhelming Taranis in the other to go an ignominious 0-4. This should hardly be much of a fight.

When the buzzer sounds, SCATMAN's out of the gate quickly, though. Steelhead, perhaps aware of its opponent's formidable speed and wedge, is a bit more tactical, angling outwards and trying to line up an approach that'll allow it to sneak a flipping prong beneath. No dice. Noah's trying to do the exact same thing with SCATMAN, so we get about thirty seconds of robotic ballet from these pansies. Then, SCATMAN's slightly higher speed is telling, it manages to wedge its opponent, and the chainsaw can do its thing. The treads are surprisingly grippy, pulling Steelhead further into the dustpan and making its escape attempts difficult. The English machine, flywheel wailing at full tilt, doesn't give up on squirming out, however, and its two free wheels push back against SCATMAN, which is inching it - slowly but surely - towards the hazards.

And Trihunter's had enough. at a slight angle, he fires his bot's flipper, full-powered, into SCATMAN's chainsaw, and the arm is flung back. Both bots buck upwards before Steelhead is able to escape. Partly through luck and partly due to readiness and positioning, it's able to quickly slip a prong beneath its opponent. Its flipper doesn't quite have a full meter of power yet but, with the American machine already starting to hook away, the weapon fires. SCATMAN is lifted up and...just barely over. The chainsaw engine makes some ugly sputtering sounds as it immediately begins to self-right. Steelhead's right on top of it, however, interrupting the process and scoring a second quick blow that tosses the End of the Line LLC entry up but not quite over. It's dangerously near the low wall, at this point, but Noah's managed to self right and is quickly out of danger.

Eventually able to outdrive his opponent, Noah opts to dispense with the cute angling in dance. It's a head-to-head charge that's he's probably not likely to win until... he brings the chainsaw down at the back moments before contact, and SCATMAN effectively gains a pressing wedge, getting cleanly under. The extra speed, from charging straight in, causes Steelhead to ride much further up its wedge, and the chainsaw comes back around, right between the prongs, before it can back fully off. The chainsaw treads and flywheel meet, thudding and grinding against each other as a pushing match ensues. Trihunter watches his bot pushed slowly but surely towards one of the Fatales again and attempts to fire his flipper to break it lose. However, while both bots jump a little bit, it's not in position to flick the saw arm away this time, and Steelhead takes its first serious hit of the match. The hazard's only at minimum power, thankfully, so it does little more than flick the pair of bots away.

Amazingly, SCATMAN still has its opponent in a death grip. That bootleg weapon is surprisingly effective. With the pin timer running down, it manages to stuff it into the now-green hazard a second time, which flings it away and is now glowing yellow. The two robots reset, and Trihunter times Noah's chainsaw-drive gambit this time, using his decreased mobility immediately before impact to create a slight angle and slip a prong beneath. This, now, is a true flip. SCATMAN does a full 540 and lands hard on the arena floor, Steelhead already back on top of it. A weak flick tosses Noah's bot up but not over once more and... that's it for the chainsaw's engine. It's conked out. The American machine self-rights, but tumbles right onto Steelhead's flipper again. Another half-power flip sends it over and towards the Fatales, but it lands with the pseudo-clamshell of its chainsaw arm and dustpan open, allowing it to quickly scoot away.

With time growing short, the flight resumes a pattern of angling in, though Steelhead mostly seems to be playing this defensively, keeping its front facing SCATMAN. With less than twenty seconds remaining, it finally chooses its moment, darting forward and cutting off the angle as SCATMAN swings out in preparation for an angling attempt. And...FLIP! Steelhead charges forward. Flick! It doesn't have much power, but it sends the dustpan bot skidding into that yellow Fatale, which takes a nasty chunk out of one of its wheels and flings it hard into a wall. Slightly unbalanced, Noah's bot nonetheless rebounds on the offensive immediately, using its advantageous angle to get to the English machine's side and shove it towards the hazards. Steelhead pushes and bucks in response, and that's just enough for it to avoid taking a hit as time expires. We're going to the judges.

Aggression: 3-2 IMMA SCATMAN
Damage: 3-2 Steelhead
Strategy: 3-2 Steelhead

Result: Steelhead wins an 8-7 judges' decision!

(5) Maurdread - Team Obscure: 2-2 ~vs.~ (6) Shellshock - Team Vertigo: 2-2

Written by Hooray For Lexan

Shellshock lumbers out of its starting square and starts to spin up, actually wrenching itself off course and nearly hitting the wall once that rotary engine gets near peak torque. Maurdread’s not being too aggressive with its box rush, though, and makes sure it gets itself lined up, gyro-ing back and forth a tiny bit as Shellshock tries to juke it. It hits the shell spinner pretty much dead-center, though…

...or rather, it gets hit dead-center. Weapon-to-weapon is a little harder than it sounds when you’ve got what, a good four inches of “wedge” underneath your drum, and your opponent’s teeth are also by the ground. It’s only a glancing blow, but there’s still a huge gash ripped in Maurdread’s front wedge, and it looks like it may actually be hanging loose. Shellshock goes reeling away, its srimech pole spinning wildly. Maurdread tries to come in and take advantage of its weakness, and this time gets an actual hit! Shellshock gets popped a couple feet in the air and goes flying horizontally, and as it lands it hits the floor and starts coining!

Despite suffering early damage Maurdread now has the advantage! It comes in again as Shellshock bounces down, and lands a glancing blow on the shell, and then another! Shellshock’s awkward shape is making it harder for Maurdread to bite in, but it finally catches one of the upper teeth and nearly flips it over, with Shellshock only being saved by its flailing srimech pipe hitting the floor. Another attempted followup from Maurdread has its damaged wedge in the way, and that buys Shellshock a couple seconds to maneuver away. This time the Mecanums actually come in handy as it jukes away from Maurdread.

Neither robot is quite at full speed when the two of them make contact again, but it’s enough to grab onto the torn edges of Maurdread’s wedge and rip it free of the bot! But Maurdread’s still running, and that engine sounds angry! If anything, losing the wedge may have actually improved its weapon functionality as it tanks another massive hit on the drum that flings Shellshock into the wall. It bounces away and spins back up, and there’s another huge hit and another huge shower of sparks! Shellshock gets thrown into a Fatale, and while it’s not damaged it is briefly stuck on the hazard. Maurdread rushes in and gets a hit, flipping it on its side as it tries to drive away, then has a go at the underbelly. I think I see Mecanum rollers littering the arena floor, but Shellshock gets turned back on its wheels, limps away, and spins up again. Again its torque spins it out of control, and Maurdread tries to capitalize… but there’s a HUGE HIT!

Maurdread goes spinning away, one of its frame rails noticeably buckled inward, and the drum grinds to a halt. It also looks like one wheel has stopped. The only sound in the arena is the howl of a Wankel engine getting up to peak rpm! Shellshock limps towards Maurdread, which wisely decides to stop moving.

Your winner, by knockout in 1:59, is Shellshock!

(7) Chernabog - Team Instant Regret: 2-2 ~vs.~ (9) Taranis - Team British Robotics: 1-3

Written by Rocket

The fight kicks off with Taranis' drisc roaring into life as it powers off in search of a head-on collision with the bat-winged crusher Chernabog. Not being an abject coward, HFL responds in kind and charges his face into Taranis' own. The wide skids of the spinner might help it stay grounded, but they're very far apart and Chernabog is easily able to get underneath them. TBR's machine rides up the wedge, but it's still facing forward as Chernabog deploys its crusher and OH! That's a big hit there! The powerful spinner makes heavy contact with the inside edge of the crusher's beak and knocks it back, dealing some nasty damage to it and forcing HFL to back off. Taranis isn't having any of it, though! TBR's keeping the pressure on as the thick vertical spinner charges up the wedge yet again, and the beak drops and takes another smack! Chernabog just isn't able to do damage like this, and the repeated hits to the crusher are beginning to take their toll. Chernabog tries again, this time taking the spinner over towards the wall at a somewhat glacial pace, but the crusher drops and again it just gets smacked back up again by the drisc! Chernabog isn't giving up yet, though; Taranis is still thoroughly stuck on its wedge and it's nearly at the wall. It rams into the wall, jostling the spinner out of alignment and pinning it in place. Now the crusher can drop! It bites down to the right of Taranis' disc, biting down through the unpowered wheel and axle on the top before it goes too low and takes ANOTHER hit from the spinner! The crusher's looking pretty beaten up, and the refs force them to break apart before it can get another bite in. Taranis whisks away towards the centre of the arena, and as Chernabog follows the spinner about-faces and charges again! This time, it's close enough that it can clip the side of the front wedge, putting a nasty dent in it.

The crusher turns and tries to get another bite in but Taranis just rams itself up the wedge again! Chernabog can't bring its battered beak down for fear of taking even more damage, so it turns away and Taranis escapes from the wedge and turns on the spot, delivering another punishing blow onto the side. This time there's enough bite to knock Chernabog onto its side, but before it can self-right the HOLY SHIT! The spinner embeds itself in the base plate of the chassis and hurls the entirety of Chernabog seven feet into the air! There's petrol and all sorts leaking out and spraying over the arena as Chernabog crashes back to earth, its crusher looking limp and its drive powering down as it slowly bleeds out in the middle of the arena! Taranis goes around the back for one more hit as the crowd roars, and there's another colossal crash as Chernabog is flipped end over end by the power of the big vertical spinner. This time, though, as it lands something shorts out and a spark sets the leaking petrol on fire, and so passes Chernabog from this fight; a chewed-up, burning mess.

Winner: Taranis, KO by Immolation, 02:42

Refer to the opening post for rules and arena details. Please be advised that the 400 word RP limit is a HARD limit from here on out. Go even one word over and you will be disqualified. Now, despite the short timeframe, let's get those RPs in and keep this thing moving!

Round Six ICEcrown Fight Card, Standings, and Results

Posted: Mon Dec 31, 2018 2:02 pm
by The Monsterworks
The Sixth Round

Well, this is it, guys. After a month and a half worth of all the good things that a tournament can give you, it's here: the final qualifying round!

While three bots - Death's Head Sarsaparilla, Detroit Iron, and Steelhead - have locked up their playoff spots and will be fighting in elite company for a chance at a first round bye or the Hammer, there are another seven bots with records of either 3-2 or 2-3. Depending on how things shake out, any of them could claim one of those elusive three remaining places. It really is all to play for. For those who make it, the playoffs and a shot at the ICEcrown itself await.

As for those who don't? We'll see you one last time next week in a six robot rumble. It was an honour hosting you, and I'd like to sincerely thank you for being part of this event and placing your faith in me to manage it. Now, with the sappy stuff out of the way, it's time for the final battle! RPs will be due on Saturday, the 5th of January, at 11:59 PM EST. If you'd like to view the bracket and current standings, please, as always, refer to our Challonge page. Writing assignments are posted below and results will be added as they filter in. Good luck!

Warm Regards,

Alex (The Monsterworks)

Sixth Round Matches

(1) Death's Head Sarsaparilla - The Monsterworks: 5-0 ~vs.~ (3) Steelhead - Team Trihunter: 4-1

Written by Hooray For Lexan

Since Death’s Head Sarsparilla has opted to ditch its shell and go with the hammer for this match, we’ve got two bots with flywheel-powered weapons in the arena. Accordingly, both robots are fairly slow out of the gates, Steelhead because it’s waiting for its flipper to be ready for a full-power shot before it closes with its opponent, and Death’s Head Sarsparilla because yes, it really is actually that slow.

But once both weapons are primed, Steelhead charges in, showing no fear of DHS’s hammer. It easily gets around the side of its opponent, but DHS has the turret, and lines up what looks like a perfect shot! It fires the hammer, but pops itself in the air, and while it does make contact it’s way to the side of where it looks like it was aiming and the hammer just glances off the side of Steelhead’s flipper prongs. With the bot off-balance Steelhead slips under it and fires! It rears forward a bit, its tail flopping around, but DHS goes flying! After what looks like a 720 followed by bouncing and rolling onto its back again, it pops itself back onto its wheels with its hammer. The weapon doesn’t retract – instead the turret just swings around 180 degrees – but as both engines are struggling to spin their respective flywheels back up Steelhead slips underneath again.

DHS swivels, getting its hammer lined up, but Steelhead fires its flipper. Well… fires, more like “fizzles.” That was a pretty lame flip, but it’s enough to roll DHS onto its back again, and it’s stuck there for another second or so which gives Steelhead time to shove it into the wall.

DHS self-rights again. It’s vulnerable now without its flywheel going, but it uses its turret like a keepaway bar and is able to push itself away from Steelhead’s next attack and get a bit more space. It runs away as best it can. Steelhead chases it down, but I’m hearing an ominous whirring and rattling from DHS again, and sure enough the hammer swings down with its usual fury! It looks poorly aligned, but – ahh, now I see what’s happening, the reaction torque of the bot’s flywheel rapidly slowing down spins it around! Doesn’t look like Alex had much driving practice with this config, but this time it looks like he’s lead the target properly, and the hammer slams down over Steelhead’s drum! Steelhead retaliates with another big flip, but it looks like one of the protective bars over the drum is bent a little.

Yet again though, Steelhead has a big advantage over its opponent. Its flipper is impressive at high speed, but even if it doesn’t get a chance to spin all the way back up a low-powered flip is still enough to pop DHS in the air or even overturn it, and DHS needs every kilojoule it can get. DHS is having to drive a lot more conservatively, and is still taking a lot of flips. Both machines are still getting blows in. DHS puts another dent in Steelhead’s protective pipes, and later after getting flipped a full 720 degrees it takes advantage of not needing to self-right and brings the hammer down on one of Steelhead’s overhanging top “scales,” breaking one of them off. Steelhead trips one of the Fatales to green and shoves DHS into it, which bends one of DHS’s shiny wheelguard pipes.

Then, about halfway through the match, DHS gets another solid hit on the framework over Steelhead’s drum. It takes a flip, but I see sparks coming from the drum! The flywheel seems like it’s still spinning, but after a couple seconds there’s smoke and a stripe of bare metal on the drum’s surface. Then nothing. Steelhead takes another hit to one of its flipper prongs, putting a nice dent in it, but flings DHS in the air again. DHS lands on its wheels, charges back in, and gets another hammer shot! It’s lower-powered, but that also makes it easier to aim, and he manages to hit the same tube! There’s more sparks, and… it’s hard to tell because Steelhead’s drum is almost featureless – no, there’s a hole in it for the locking bar, and that’s stationary! The flywheel is not working!

It’s now plan B for Steelhead! It’s now a pushbot, but it has a wedge and a much faster drivetrain. It starts ramming and shoving for all its worth, but DHS’s circular shape and turret make it a slippery target, and even if it’s on a wedge it can still keep smacking away, and, uhh… I think actually half of those are missing, but at some point one of Steelhead’s exhaust pipes falls off. DHS, for its part, takes another Fatale hit before the end of the match that leaves one of its whitewall tires looking a bit worse for wear and the wheel wobbling. This is going to be one hell of a match to call.

Judges’ Decision:

Damage: Death’s Head Sarsparilla 4, Steelhead 1
Aggression: Death’s Head Sarsparilla 2, Steelhead 3
Control: Death’s Head Sarsparilla 2, Steelhead 3

Oof… an 8-7, and it’s a Split Decision too, with one of the judges going for Steelhead! But in the end, your winner, and undefeated moving into the playoffs at 6-0, is… Death’s Head Sarsparilla!

(2) Detroit Iron - Tartarus Robotics Group: 4-1 ~vs.~ (4) Shellshock - Team Vertigo: 3-2

Written by Wolf51-50 The Monsterworks

I'd love to tell you that this was an epic fight. I'd like to regale you with stories of an upset for the ages or at least a clash of titans: spinner versus brick in the finest ARC tradition. Truth is, I can't. This fight goes pretty much as predicted. Shellshock remains game and attempts to be aggressive, and it very nearly manages to go over the top of Detroit Iron's wedge, but Laz is wise to that strategy as well as the strafing and 'spin it with a hit and dart back in' shenanigans that Noisy earnestly tries. It's three minutes of a shell spinner getting bullied around by a brick, with occasional escapes and big hits.

There are some impressive wall slams that seem to rattle Shellshock, but its the relentless use of the hazards that put paid to Shellshock's chances just after the two minute mark. The arena is strewn with mecanum rollers and, try as it might, the Scottish machine just can't seem to move anymore. On the flip side, Detroit Iron's wedge is looking pretty mangled by the time it's done, but it did what it was supposed to do.

Result: Detroit Iron wins by KO at 2:11 and secures a first-round bye. Shellshock will have to contest the quarterfinals.

(5) Screamroller - Aquatic Robotics: 3-2 ~vs.~ (9) Chernabog - Team Instant Regret: 2-3

Written by The Monsterworks

The match kicks off with a lot of noise. Screamroller is a lawnmower on bath salts and Chernabog is... well, kinda the same. The Aquatic Robotics entry charges out like it's been using the stuff as well, not even paying much heed to spinning up before reaching its opponent. For his part, HFL has his bot's caw raised as high as it can go, definitely wary of losing his weapon to the surprisingly damaging flails of Screamroller.

The two machines meet and both are buffeted and bounced. Despite HFL's best efforts, the flails still connect with his bot's claw and the initial hit, at least, leaves a nasty divot in its wedge. The force of the impacts isn't what it would be for a more traditional spinner, but Chernabog and Screamroller are still forced apart, the latter with its flails having lost a lot of their kinetic energy.

Chernabog, damaged wedge, slightly bent beak, and all, charges in. Screamroller more or less accepts the challenge by barreling forward itself. This time, the crusher wins out. Jack, who seems strangely distracted, mashes the controls, but his bot's high-centered. Down comes the crusher, pulling up just short of the frame. and trapping Screamroller's weapon but failing to do any damage.

Chernabog is already pushing the trapped spinner towards a wall, however, and once it has it pinned, it readjusts its grip. Now we get some of that good old fashioned Razer action. Down comes the claw, straight into the upper-front metal frame of Screamroller. That slows its progress for a moment before buckling. Lexan gives way with a slight pop and the claw continues to slice deeper, ending up tantalizingly short of the Internal Combustion heart of the Aquatic Robotics entry.

Forced to release its prey at the conclusion of the pin timer, Chernabog shakes and twists it free, not quite managing any further visible damage, and the bots reset. Screamroller seems to know only one way to fight: full aggression, and the Team Instant Regret bot deals with its approach a bit better this time, taking less damage, though its wedge is looking pretty dicey by this point. HFL is quicker on the draw with his strategy and also closer to the wall, shoving his opponent's bot into it and biting down between the drum and the body near the left side. Then, Chernabog does its best crocodile impression, shaking Screamroller as best it can with a relatively slow drivetrain. High-centered, the spinner tries to escape to no avail.

Then, it spits a red rubber belt out, which dangles limply as it continues to take punishment. Eventually, an attempt to readjust its grip causes Chernabog to let one of its opponent's wheels touch the ground, and Screamroller squirts free. The problem is that it's now without a weapon. The remainder of the fight is fairly one-sided, with the spinner unable to mount any offense. Chernabog manages a couple more quality pierces, and feeds its opponent to a Fatale each time but, amazingly, Screamroller is still driving at the end of the match, and we have to go to the judges.

Aggression: 3-2 Screamroller
Damage: 3-2 Chernabog
Strategy: 5-0 Chernabog

Result: Chernabog wins a 10-5 judges' decision and has booked its ticket to the playoffs! Screamroller will have to wait for a couple of other results to ensure its place in the knockout stages.

(6) Taranis - Team British Robotics: 2-3 ~vs.~ (10) Labrys - Team Worst Swordsman: 2-3

Written by The_Angry_Goat

So TBR is playing entirely around labry’s hammer, and is rather surprised when Rocket doesn’t just immediately fire it or anything. Even with his far superior drive stats, Rocket’s able to do a damned good job of staying forewards for quite some time, as the two face off. Labrys’ opening gambit didn’t quite give her the advantage she had wanted – she got Taranis up on her wedge a bit, but TBR was able to squirrel off to one side. Eventually Taranis does manage to get around to the side and get in a little bite. And by little bite I mean smack labrys into a 360. It lands and the damage is immediately apparent, as Labrys is now stuck circling with the non-damaged side. Despite that, it’s able to put up a relatively decent fight for a while longer, again fending off the circling shark quite well. Taranis is forced to settle for an awkward angle in that doesn’t let it get the best bite, bit the front of Labrys still crumples like tissue paper.
At least we know it wasn’t actually tissue paper, since she used her full stock on Hobart :V . regardless Labrys gets off remarkably well all things considered, but its wedge is useless, and the whole bot’s kinda built around it so that’s probably an issue. Rocket tries some tricky maneuvering to get an axe hit in on Taranis at this last moment, but it’s all over, at least after TBR takes another 20 seconds to not come at Labrys from the front :V

Your winner, by KO in 1:34, is Taranis!

(7) Maurdread - Team Obscure: 2-3 ~vs.~ (11) The HMS Bucolic - Angry Goat Robotics: 1-4


In the red square: the weirdly shaped drum that could, the expectation-defeating Maurdread. And in the blue square: Oh, say can you see... no seriously can you see, while we where pointing the cameras at the driver he pulled out from under his sleeve a half-sized american flag and mounted it on top of his robot.

Anyways the battle begins and 1812 overture (what do you mean it has nothing to do with this, it's all we have the budget for, this ain't REDDIT) starts playing as HMS Bucolic cannons out of it's square, charging straight at Maurdread, who tries to dodge the attack but fails horribly so the drill actually makes contact with the side of it's opponent and the engine roars as sparks already start flying.


Maurdread counters this by turning in an attempt to face Bucolic, and it actually just keeps charging, slides off Maurdread and goes straight at the wall. And now the american bot starts drilling a hole in the wall, tires screeching and all.

And now the french bot closes in and lands a hit on Bucolic's rear wheel and rips it out clean and waits for his weapon to fully spin up, and then comes in again to land a hit timed perfectly with the drop the first cannon shot. Said hit was a lot better and it bends HMS's entire chassis.

Mystic backs away to spin up again only to realize that the drill is actually stuck in the wall, so he decides to just dance in the middle of the arena while the american bot gets counted out.

Result: The HMS Bucolic loses by excessive patriotism Maurdread wins by KO in 0:32

(8) Hovercrap - Team Design Flaw: 2-3 ~vs.~ (12) IMMA SCATMAN - End of the Line LLC.: 0-5

Written by Rocket

Since Vee's blackout drunk in a titty bar in Ulaanbataar again, IMMA SCATMAN has been put in the hands of the nearest available driver. Sadly, that was a penguin that escaped from a nearby penal institution, and he has since made off with an extremely large diamond and some interesting trousers. The judges are very confused. Hovercrap wins by default.

Winner: Hovercrap, KO by Confusion, 00:09

Refer to the opening post for rules and arena details. Please be advised that the 400 word RP limit is a HARD limit. Go even one word over and you will be disqualified. Now, for the last time during the regular season, let's get those RPs in and keep this thing moving!

Re: ICEcrown Fight Card, Standings, and Results

Posted: Thu Jan 10, 2019 5:54 pm
by The Monsterworks
Playoffs: Preliminaries

And just like that, the playoffs are here. Six bots down, six remaining. Ultimately, despite solid showings that saw them tally even or near-even records, it wasn't quite enough from Maurdread, Taranis, Hovercrap, and Labrys. So how about that super six? While our top two: Death's Head Sarsaparilla and Detroit Iron will be sitting the preliminaries out, the other four are going to be in action!

King of that lot is Steelhead. While a split decision loss to the undefeated Death's Head Sarsaparilla cost it the top seed and a first round bye, it's consolation has been nothing to sneeze at. Awarded the 'hammer' for its third place finish, it was allowed to face an opponent of its driver's choosing. The unlucky bot chosen was fifth seed Shellshock, leaving Screamroller to contest a rematch of last week's battle with Chernabog.

RPs will be due on Saturday, the 12th of January, at 11:59 PM EST. If you'd like to review the bracket and final standings, please, as always, refer to our Challonge page. However, the official bracket is finished. Your source for playoff information is this thread! Writing assignments are posted below and results will be added as they filter in. Good luck!

Playoff Matches

(3) (3) Steelhead - Team Trihunter: 4-2 ~vs.~ (5) Shellshock - Team Vertigo: 3-3

Written by Hooray For Lexan

It’s the playoffs baby! This matchup looks familiar, but now both drivers have had a chance to learn from past mistakes, so we’ll see how it plays out.

Shellshock lurches out of its square and quickly gets spun around almost out of control as the shell really starts spinning up. It stops the spin and starts drifting away from the wall, but by then Steelhead’s already across the arena and slams into it, which bounces Shellshock into the wall and then out into the middle of the arena, its srimech pole spinning around like a weathervane in a tornado. Steelhead’s after it again, but it dodges away behind the center nail and is able to get back up to speed.

Steelhead attacks again, but Shellshock’s now got more room to maneuver. It suddenly strafes to the side, and that’s a huge hit! Shellshock careens through the air and bounces across the floor all the way across the arena, but Steelhead is spun around so violently it gets flipped on its back by the gyroscopic forces of its drum. It sits motionless for a second, then fires the flipper and is just barely able to somersault back onto its wheels – that tail came very close to getting in the way. The hit doesn’t seem to have damaged it besides putting a significant dent in the outer side of one flipper prong, but it does buy Shellshock a bit more time to spin back up and get away from the walls.

Will we see a repeat of that last hit? No, Steelhead’s a bit more cagey this time, and anticipates the strafing maneuver. It’s able to deflect Shellshock, then come in again and knock it into the wall. Ouch, I felt that one from the commentary table. Shellshock’s coining a bit again, and Steelhead takes the opportunity to stuff it into the wall again and flip!

Shellshock gets tossed into the air. It crashes down belly-up. Thanks to the self-righting pole it starts to spin and bounce around, but Steelhead shunts it into the wall again… and again… and pins it briefly, and I’m not sure I can hear Shellshock’s engine. Steelhead backs off. Shellshock flops sideways a bit, but that’s not controlled translational movement. It tries again and gets its engine restarted, but Steelhead bumps it again. Shellshock bounces away spinning a bit faster now, but the countdown starts. 9… 8… 7… 6… and Shellshock finally flops back onto its wheels!

Even as the shell spinner’s still wobbling, though, Steelhead rushes back in and flips it a second time! This time it lands upright and maneuvers away, but Steelhead is not giving it much time to spin up. It’s taking big hits, but the flipper prongs seem to be holding up pretty well. There, finally, it misreads Shellshock’s strafing and takes another solid hit that sends it pirouetting away on two wheels. It isn’t flipped over this time, though, and eventually it knocks Shellshock into the corner. It bounces off the Fatale, right back into Steelhead’s loving embrace, and gets launched into the air again, landing inverted on the arena hazard! It’s not really taking damage, but it keeps getting spun around and that’s really interfering with its self-righting! So does another flip from Steelhead that bounces it off the Lexan! It takes a third hit from the Fatale, which is now orange, but eventually gets back on its wheels with the little flag with the bot’s name on it missing from the srimech pole.

There’s now about thirty seconds left, and Steelhead uses every second of that to bully Shellshock, and almost flips it into the OOTA area behind the blue square. Imagine what that bot could do if Tri actually knew they were a feature of this arena? But in our timeline, Shellshock survives the three minutes by the skin of its teeth!

Judges’ Decision:

Damage: Steelhead 2, Shellshock 3
Aggression: Steelhead 4, Shellshock 1
Control: Steelhead 5, Shellshock 0

Your winner, by an 11-4 Judges’ Decision, is Steelhead!

(4) Screamroller - Aquatic Robotics: 3-3 ~vs.~ (6) Chernabog - Team Instant Regret: 3-3

Written by The Monsterworks

Alright, you buncha greasy fucks. I've finally sat my lazy, neckbearded arse down to write this damned thing. So here's how it goes:

Chernabog wants to basically just repeat what it did last time. Like, really wants to repeat it, as in... no changes to its strategy at all. Can't tell if that's just laziness or some kind of gambit Goddammit, HFL! That means it's aiming for a direct head to head and hoping to kind of slowly grind Screamroller's drum down to low speed. Jack's having none of that. He's determined to go for the sides, using some gyroscopic fuckery to get him there. So...what do we get?

Like, a minute's worth of robotic ballet without any of the things that make ballet entertaining. What" You're saying ballet isn't entertaining. Fuckin' uncultured swine, mang. Anyways, Screamroller manages the odd fleeting contact but, by and large, Chernabog just backs off a bit and re-centers to get its wedge facing the spinner again. Black Dog, this bot is not.

Anyways, things finally get interesting at about the 1:10 mark when Screamroller kind of loses control for a second and HFL decides, 'fuck it, mate. Time to blow it all to hell'. He smacks Chernabog into its opponent and... well, that's one way to wreck a whole lot of expensive shit. Screamroller's not quite as 'out of control' as it would've seemed. It takes one of the Team Instant Regret machine's self-righting wings clean off, warps its crusher, and flings it away like a fat kid rejecting the broccoli on his dinner plate.

Incidentally, Jack's bot gets launched too. Luckily, the dice of fate are smiling on both of these goofballs, and Chernabog lands on the side with a functional srimech while Screamroller lands right side up. HFL's no idiot, so he doesn't try to crowd his opponent. Self-righting takes long enough that he's just happy to avoid a follow-up shot. The Aquatic Robotics entry gambles again on another sneaky gyro move, but... no dice. This time, Chernabog's able to stall its drum, grab it, and pinch. HFL's not able to thrash the belt off this time like he did before. His opponent's been careful to angle in only from the safer side. However, it is a nice pin, a bit of damage dealt both by the crusher and the hazards, and a clock winding closer to the finish.

Screamroller is released at the end of the pin timer, and another flanking attempt occurs, with Screamroller wheel-standing nearly perpendicular to the arena floor. Chernabog has the pattern now, though, and takes the blow at an angle. HFL actually muffs it slightly, and the tip of the crusher takes a serious buckling but, when the bots are thrown apart, the flail spinner has landed upside down. Jack attempts some movement with the drum, trying to last until the fast-approaching final buzzer, but it's not controlled movement and the ref isn't buying it.

Result: Chernabog wins by KO at 2:50 and will advance to the semifinals!

Refer to the opening post for rules and arena details. Please be advised that the 400 word RP limit is a HARD limit. Go even one word over and you will be disqualified. Now, for the last time during the regular season, let's get those RPs in and keep this thing moving!

Re: ICEcrown Fight Card, Standings, and Results

Posted: Wed Jan 16, 2019 11:09 am
by The Monsterworks
Playoffs: Semifinals

Only four remain: Death's Head Sarsaparilla, Detroit Iron, Steelhead, and Chernabog. While the former two sat out, last week saw us bid farewell to initial #1 seed Shellshock and underdog flail spinner Screamroller. None are safe this week as we accelerate towards the conclusion. There are three matches left in the tournament. The ICEcrown awaits in its freezer, ready to be placed upon the head of the victor. There can be only one.


RPs will be due on Saturday, the 19th of January, at 11:59 PM EST. If you'd like to review the bracket and final standings, please, as always, refer to our Challonge page. However, the official bracket is finished. Your sole source for playoff information is this thread! Writing assignments are posted below and results will be added as they filter in. Good luck!

Semifinal Matches

(3) Steelhead - Cool Story Brobotics: 5-2 ~vs.~ (6) Chernabog - Team Instant Regret: 4-3


The bell rings or whatever is the artifact that makes a sound to indicate the start of the fight does it's thing and Chernabog immediately charges at Steelhead while it takes a more cautious approach.

They meet a few seconds later, Steelhead tries to angle in but fails to do so and rides up Chernabog's wedge, Tri quickly realizes this and backs away at an angle before the crusher can get it's slow claw down. Now the flipper is facing it's opponent's side and charges at it before it can fully turn, meaning that Steelhead successfully angles-in in a weird maneuver. So naturally Steelhead goes for the flip and high Chernabog goes, landing upside-down. The flipper goes after it, pushes around a little to make some time, and fires it's weapon at close to full power just before the crusher self rights. But this time it lands on it's wheels so it charges at Steelhead, gets under it's flipper and... just kidding, Tri gets off again.

This keeps going on for the next 20 or so seconds until hfl manages to get it's opponent next to a wall so it can't back away and closes it's claw on top of Steelhead's drum, Sparks fly but no real damage happens BUT Chernabog has a very good grip so it just moves the flipper to the nearest fatale, the tail touches and activates it. hfl still has plenty of time so he backs off, waits for the fatale to turn green, and go at it again, After that he lets the fish thing go.
Some seconds later they meet face to face again and Chernabog wins the wedge war again AND gets enough time to get that solid grip with it claw, so naturally he drives to the yellow fatale and pushes Steelhead all the way in the thing, though they where rather away from it so hfl has to let go right away.

Immediately Steelhead turns around before hfl can react and gets under from the side and launches it's opponent right away. Chernabog bounces on the wall while airborne and lands upright behind Steelhead, it can't fully turn around before the crusher manages to grab its side and pins it again the wall. Hfl tries to turn so he can push it to the nearby orange fatale, but tri escapes, gets a reasonable distance away, turns around, and procedes to attack. This time it actually gets under and fires it's flipper, though the only thing that happens is Chernabog doing a somersault, lucky hfl.

Or that what he thought, now he is close to the orange fatale, facing away form it and is about to meet Steelhead face to face.
Tri carefully angles in and throws the black crusher to the corner, and it does land sideways on the fatale, there goes half a srimech wing and it gets pushed away by the power of the now red hazard.

Time is running out, Steelhead charges at hfl's machine but it self right with whats left of that srimech before making contact with it's opponent. Steelhead still gets under and throws Chernabog high into the sky, it lands close by on the damaged wing side. Tri takes the opportuny to go around and push the flipped crusher from the other side towards the red fatale, Chernabog does self right, but it's still on those tusks heading straight to it's doom.

Steelhead get's close to the fatale and fires it's flipper, and Chernabog goes straight to hell the red fatale, it lands on the good wing that get's obliterated and then the devilish hazard torns off parts of it's side panels and throws the bot far away, it can't self right now and starts to get counted out but before that the 3 minute timer runs out so this goes to a judges decision.

Judges decision:

Damage: Steelhead 4 - Chernabog 1
Aggression: Steelhead 3 - Chernabog 2
Control: Steelhead 2 - Chernabog 3

Result: Steelhead wins by 9 - 6

(1) Death's Head Sarsaparilla - The Monsterworks: 6-0 ~vs.~ (2) Detroit Iron - Tartarus Robotics Group: 5-1

Written by Rocket

The battle kicks off with both teams taking a slightly defensive approach, DHS because it can't outspeed an arthritic glacier and DI because... because... er, hang on, is everything okay down there? I heard a loud thump, and it wasn't DHS's hammer. The match is stopped while Laz opens up his robot and sighs. The engine block's sustained some damage somewhere along the line and a hairline crack must have formed, because somehow the entire engine block inside the rambot has split in half and come loose from its mounting, splurging oil and fuel everywhere in the robot. Laz looks up at the judges and shakes his head; even with a spare, there's not enough time to make the robot safe for operation, as all the internal components are soaked in flammable substances and cleaning or replacing the entirety of the electronics would take ages. It's a shame, but Detroit Iron has to forfeit, leaving Death's Head Sarsaparilla's unbeaten record intact for the grand final.

Winner: DHS, KO by FF (00:04#)

Refer to the opening post for rules and arena details. Please be advised that the 400 word RP limit is a HARD limit. Go even one word over and you will be disqualified. Now, with the championship round looming, let's get those RPs in and keep this thing moving!

ICEcrown: The Championship

Posted: Sun Jan 27, 2019 7:05 pm
by The Monsterworks
The Championship

At the end of it all, two bots lined up in The Noir for the final time, facing each other across a battle-scarred floor that had been pristine mere weeks ago. The Monsterworks' Death's Head Sarsaparilla and Cool Story Brobotics' Steelhead: both have conquered every other obstacle that has stood in their way. At the conclusion of this week's match, one will hoist the ICEcrown itself:


RPs will be due on Saturday, the 26th of January, at 11:59 PM EST. If you'd like to review the bracket and final standings, please, as always, refer to our Challonge page. However, the official bracket is finished. Your sole source for playoff information is this thread! Writing assignments are posted below and results will be added as they filter in. Good luck!

The Championship

(1) Death's Head Sarsaparilla - The Monsterworks: 7-0 ~vs.~ (3) Steelhead - Cool Story Brobotics: 6-2

Written by Hooray for Lexan

After forty grueling, spectacular, and dare I say it LOUD battles, it’s finally time for the ICECrown grand final! Steelhead has made it this far without two much difficulty, with only two losses. One of those, to Chernabog, it already avenged to get here, but the other one is to its opponent... Death’s Head Sarsparilla! DHS is undefeated with both its shell spinner and its hammer modules, and it’s using the weapon that brought Steelhead’s flywheel-powered flipper to a grinding halt last time they fought. Will history repeat itself?

Both bots get their flywheels spinning. Death’s Head Sarsparilla lumbers out of its square, but Steelhead’s already halfway across the arena, swerving around the center nail. With DHS’s weapon mounted on a turret, Steelhead doesn’t bother getting out of the line of fire. It rushes straight in, and takes a big hit on the flipper, but that also knocks DHS off-balance a bit, and Steelhead has no trouble getting under it. That’s a big flip! DHS bounces off the Lexan on the way down and lands on its side, then rolls onto its back, and that was pretty close to the OOTA area. DHS is going to have to be careful with its positioning here!

Anyway, DHS has enough momentum left to kick itself back onto its wheels, but as it retracts the hammer Steelhead slips under it again. Neither flywheel is at full speed, but Steelhead flips anyway – unfortunately tossing its opponent pretty much straight up. DHS lands on top of it, tipped over at an awkward angle but still technically upright. It swivels its turret, trying to line up a shot, as Steelhead pushes it backwards and tries to get it towards a Fatale. DHS fires, and doesn’t make contact, but does knock itself free and jukes away from the wall, swerving around and buying itself an extra second or two.

Steelhead’s still on the attack, but DHS is now in good position for a counterpunch. The hammer comes flying down just as Steelhead gets under, and smacks right into Steelhead’s drum, sending sparks into the air. It looks like the hit landed to the side of the keepaway tubes, though, and again such a powerful blow pops DHS in the air. Steelhead gets under it and gives it a good shove towards the corner before flipping again.

Death’s Head Sarsparilla goes flying. It lands on its side but bounces down upright. The hammer head gets clipped by the Fatale’s tooth, knocking it sideways a bit. Steelhead needs to spin back up for a flip – or does it? It just lunges in and shoves its opponent onto the hazard, taking a hit on one of the tubes for its trouble. That’s dangerous! It looks like the tube held up this time apart from a small kink, but those things bending and contacting the drum was what lost it the last match!

Steelhead backs off a little, and DHS gets spat back out by the Fatale. It’s only green for some reason – not sure if the ref saw the glancing hit on the hammer head. Sarsparilla books it out of there at full speed, but Steelhead muscles in and gets it pinned against the wall! Both flywheels get up to full speed as DHS struggles to get its turret lined up. The wall’s kind of in the way and it’s pushed too far up on the wedge to contact Steelhead’s protective tubes, or reach much of anything else really with the angle it’s at, but it strikes anyway and at least bends one of the fake exhaust pipes. It knocks itself partially free, but Steelhead retaliates with a flip that sends DHS tumbling away.

DHS has to self-right and run away again. Steelhead pursues it, getting another weak flip, then just ramming it as it self-rights. It gets back upright, barely, but it’s still wedged. It tries to free itself with a hammer blow, but isn’t quite off yet. It finally swings the turret around and boops Steelhead’s exhaust pipe to push itself free, and – oof, there’s a missed flip from Steelhead! DHS swivels itself away, now going pretty fast. Steelhead didn’t lose too much momentum on the missed flip, though, and it stays on the attack, but there’s another well-aimed blow from DHS, and another of the protective tubes gets kinked a bit!

This still earns DHS another 540 flip, though. It lands inverted a few feet away, pretty much in the middle of the arena, and, uhh, is doing something with its turret. If it’s trying to turn the hammer it’s not working, right now it's mostly just rotating its own chassis. It settles for just self-righting after a second or so of this, but that’s enough for Steelhead to get lined up for another attack. DHS gets wedged, but not flipped yet. It turns its turret off to the side, but also waits to get its flywheel up to full speed – but it’s rapidly getting pushed across the arena, straight towards the blue square and the OOTA area! Look out!

DHS reacts first, firing the hammer and ending up on top of Steelhead again – and actually, Steelhead starts dragging it around... are those wheelguards stuck with one of Steelhead’s fake exhaust pipes through them? I think so, but DHS fires again, knocking itself free for real and putting one more dent in the arena floor to remember this event by. They’re not far from the OOTA zone. DHS tried to drive away, but Steelhead cuts off its retreat, pretty much getting right in its face and taking a hammer blow on the tail as it spins around. Not sure what that did, but Steelhead’s under DHS and this trout smells blood! It gives the hammerbot a shove straight towards the OOTA zone, and this time does get the flip off first? Will it go out? DHS soars through the air, wobbling from the gyroscopic effect of its flywheel. It lands on top of the low barrier... AND TOPPLES OUT OF THE ARENA INTO SECOND PLACE!

Your winner, by OOTA in 1:54 and the ICECrown Grand Champion, is... Steelhead!

Refer to the opening post for rules and arena details. Please be advised that the 400 word RP limit is a HARD limit. Go even one word over and you will be disqualified. Now, with the only the final hurdle left, let's get those RPs in and crown a champion!