FIGHT CARD WEEK ONE
RP here:
https://www.reddit.com/r/ROBOTSrproom/
Incomplete robots have until wednesday be completed, or they will be counted as forfeiting this week (but can still participate in future weeks). robots that are required to declare configurations also have until wednesday to not FF.
the bot on the left is in the red square, the bot on the right is in the blue square. keep in mind that the arena is asymmetrical, and this might affect your strategy.
Featherweights
The Beast from the West vs The Mafia
Yeah fractional point totals are illegal, my dude. Unfortunately for himself TBR decided to FF for no reason so you win. Wheeee
Winner: The Mafia by FF
Oh wait never mind TBR just cant find threads apparently. Also both of these dumbasses are going for each others sides with almost entirely equivalent drivetrains. Well anywho this actually lets the Mafia get under first, since its a bit more stable at close range, and it pops the opposing vertical spinner up and over, but Beasts spinner impacts the ground and quickly brings it back upright. The mafias able to get in a second hit at about the same spot that starts bending the front armor on the right side just a tad. They both go back to circling, and this time The Mafia oversteers, and exposes its flank for just a half second. Beast moves in, but ends up just clipping Mafias back right wheel. Even with just a clip, the wheel is now stuck at a funny angle that basically relegates the bot to 3WD due to how low its ground clearance is. This, of course, makes turning even harder for Guilden, but hes still going for some sort of advantageous angle since his wedge is worse. This is the part where TBR realizes he should probably just look the gift horse in the mouth and just get under his opponents wedge from the front, which he does, delivering a spectacular blow that knocks Mafias front wedge into its own spinner, mangling the whole thing and leaving it upside-down. with only one of its rear wheels in working condition, and Beast lurking, Guilden taps out to avoid further damage.
Your winner, by KO in 1:13, is The Beast from The west!
Private Iron vs Tree Surgeon
Yeah you dont get 9s off of a 10 weapon stat, its the 2/3 rule, not the -1 rule . things are relatively even for a while, Tree surgeon out-jousting and out-wedging its opponent. Tree Surgeon never really gets a good saw in during this time (the spinner doesnt die because its just kinda hanging out, up top of everything, humming angrily. Anywho, about a minute in Iron finally gets under and Tree surgeons right side crumples like tinfoil. The thing isnt even poorly built, or that low armored, and it still did that. anywho the followup hit leave the Surgeon of trees suspiciously smokey, and a third hit on the still dazed seeming bot ends its short stint in the arena this time around.
Your winner, by KO in 1:22, is Private Iron!
Bruxish vs Buzzcut
The two approach, Bruxish clearly rushing in for a quick decisive flip but Buzzcut hangs back slight, confident in its superior drivetrain and prepares for a dodge. Buzzcut masterfully evades the attack and when Bruxish tries to correct its course it slips across the arena floor, giving Buzzcut time to catch it cleanly on the side of its shell and completely high-side it on the wedge. Buzzcut takes the flipper for a ride but before it can get it into the wall Bruxish fires its flipper and launches itself off the wedge, turning slowly this time to maintain control as it corrects itself to face Buzzcut, who has rebounded off the wall and sweeps to the right in attempt to get around that flipper again. Bruxish accelerates under the wedgebot but Buzzcut is almost completely off its wedge before the flipper can be fired and is only kicked away slightly. He then flanks Bruxish yet again who just cant seem to keep up with this drive and collects the flipper once again. The two trade blows like this for most of the match and its not until the last minute when Buzzcut can finally get Bruxish to the corner and pin it against the rails. This match is clearly going to the judges.
WINNER: BUZZCUT by a 24-21 Judges Decision
Riptide vs Hat Garage
As soon as the battle starts, Hat Garage powers over towards Riptide, intent on angling in on the big blue target Force is presenting him with. However, this was all part of the drum spinners plan, and he darts forward, turns, corrects for a little oversteer, and crashes the drum into the bar itself. Its undamaged, but Hat Garage is turned over almost immediately, and its hinged wedges drop down with a clank. Not that this matters much. Riptides on the attack again, its surprising turn of speed allowing it to chain a few flips on HG until Force overcorrects and gets a mistimed hit. PTUs able to recover and snaps his punchbar right into Riptides drum, pushing it down and flipping both robots over as the drum impacts with the arena floor. HG now gets to go on the offensive, shoving Riptide around as its drum struggles to bite, until at last Force finds some purchase and Riptide full-on backflips over Hat Garage, somehow contriving to land right side up. Before the bar can retract, Force seizes the moment and powers the drum into it, catapulting PTU upwards and getting him stranded for a few seconds in the wall extenders. With the battle almost over, Hat Garage barely manages to shake itself loose and take things to a judges decision.
Aggression: Riptide 8 7 Hat Garage
Damage: Riptide 8 7 Hat Garage
Control: Hat Garage 8 7 Riptide
Winner: Riptide, JD 23-22
Epic Waluigi vs Apocalyptic Peacekeeper
Waluigi powers into the centre of the arena with AP meeting him there, and theres an almighty crunch as the two robots meet. One of the grappling arms on the grabber is torn off completely by the initial impact, as Wolf didnt get much of an opportunity to gauge the height of Waluigis weapon clearance before the attack. Rattled by this, Wolf goes to the next step of his strategy as he comes in on the next attack, feeding his wedge directly into the teeth of V900s spinner. What follows is a quite spectacular backflip from AP as the weapons collide, with Waluigi shaking the stars out of its vision first and ploughing into the exposed side of AP as it self-rights. Its another enormous hit that sends the grabber barrel-rolling through the air like a performing seal, and when it lands, its pretty obviously toast.
Winner: Epic Waluigi, KO by Immobilization 1:03
Captain Trips vs Runaway Rabbit
The fight kicks off with Runaway Rabbit racing towards Captain Trips. While the latter bot has the drivetrain advantage, it also has good reason not to stray too far from the high walls near its starting zone, lest it get OOTAed by the waifubot. Its a slow start to the fight, both robots looking very cagey, and the first minute is punctuated by the two bots trying to angle in on each other. Trips wins the wedge fight more often than not, but its unable to get much purchase or opportunity to use its lifter before RR swivels away, due in large part to Trips continued insistence on a defensive driving strategy. What lifts Shaba does get are easily nullified by Tris self-righting, and the only thing of any particular note is that one of the big fluffy ears fell off. The match continues into the second minute in a similarly tentative style, until at last Captain Trips makes a mistake and RR pounces. While the Captain is invertible, it doesnt move too fast through the air, and RR is able to sustain a chain of a few flips before Shaba scuttles away back to the high walls. This is the deciding moment in the fight, as the rest of it is more of the same as before. Cease is eventually (the heartless would say mercifully) called, and the judges are called upon to inspect the fight.
Aggression: Runaway Rabbit 4 1 Captain Trips
Damage: Runaway Rabbit 3 2 Captain Trips
Control: Runaway Rabbit 3 2 Captain Trips
Winner: Runaway Rabbit, JD 10-5
To Fry vs Vorpal Bunny
The buzzer sounds and To Fry rockets out of his box at a blistering
5 speed
to rush and try to get to Vorpal Bunny before its blade gets up to speed. Unfortunately VB dodges the rush easily and after getting up to speed turns to face To Fry. The two close the distance and Pat clearly does not want to face that huge blade on Vorpal Bunny, but unfortunately without a big drive advantage and that huge gyro bar he isnt able to stave off the inevitable any longer and Vorpal Bunny sideswipes that 3-bladed propeller blade on To Fry from its support side and spins To Fry away, cutting deep into its huge wheel as the two seperate. The two spin to try and face each other again but its clear that Pats weapon is now noticeably inhibited and hes lost almost all drive on one side. The rest of the match is clearly 1-sided and it only takes 3 more hits to completely remove its mobility.
WINNER: VORPAL BUNNY by KO in 1.04
Vicious vs Salamandra
Salamandra immediately charges, but Vicious is out of its starting square like a bullet. It fishtails into approximately the middle of the arena and whips those chains up to full speed before Salamandra can get to it. Theres no chance of getting the saw into play with that thing spinning Salamandras got to find a way of stopping it! It lines itself up and drives right into Viciouss circle of death, and CLANGCLANGCLANGCLANGCLANG!
The flails slam into Salamandras front plow, thrusting it aside and putting some scratches in the dark grey paint, but the wedge does a good job of deflecting them, and Vicious spins to a halt. It takes a second to actually get itself pointed in Salamandras general direction, and suddenly guns it forward! Vicious wheelies, skids sideways, rides up the side of Salamandras wedge, and hits the top horn hard enough to spin Salamandra around more than 180 degrees. But it sends itself flying in the process. Salamandra recovers, but Vicious has landed and gotten back up to speed already!
Several more rams from Salamandra, with Vicious generally trying to ram Salamandra once its flails have lost their energy but being too uncontrollable to pull it off very well, and Salamandra finally gets under it and shoves it into the wall. It spins the saw up and brings it down, but it only gets a good bite on Viciouss wedge. It cuts deep into the top edge of the sheet metal and ends up gouging the top of the chassis as well, but as it tries to re-adjust its grip Vicious gets a wheel on the ground and spins itself away. Salamandra stays on the attack and manages to stop Vicious again but has a really hard time corralling it.
Finally Salamandra gets the saw in again, from the side of Vicious this time! The decorative plastic chain on top is instantly snapped, and Salamandra bites into the top armor, creating a deep wound. Theres still time on the pin limit though, and it raises the saw, adjusts slightly, and brings it down again, cutting deep into Viciouss tire!
Vicious gets away again and spins back up, having given up on trying to use its wedge by this point. Salamandra rams it a few more times but cant stop its spin, and Vicious finally manages to hook the edge of the plow with its flail, delivering a big hit that spins Salamandra all the way around! It looks like the flails caught it on the backside too, not sure where. That could have damaged Salamandras saw, and in fact Dylan spins it up and brings the arm forward to test that his weapon is functional. The arm might be bent a bit
but actually when he does that the robot rears backwards! It looks like parts of the spring-loaded tail are hanging loose now! Vicious finally gets some damage points on the board!
Salamandra remains aggressive, and the saw arm keeps it from wheelieing too badly, but it definitely cant keep its wedge on the ground now. It takes more hits from Vicious
but then something purple goes flying across the arena and bounces to a stop. Thats one of Viciouss tires! Now spinning really is Viciouss only option, and its spin seems to be wobbly. It doesnt get up to speed as fast, but when Salamandra manages to stop it, it ends up riding up Viciouss wedge. It gets away, and time runs out before either bot can get another attack in.
Judges Decision:
Damage: Salamandra 3, Vicious 2
Aggression: Salamandra 4, Vicious 1
Control: Salamandra 4 Vicious 1
Your winner, by an 11-4 Judges Decision, is Salamandra!
Lightweights
Twin Typhoons vs Der Metzgermeister
Well, this fight has been delayed a bit because Der Metzgermeister was having problems with the clutch on its weapon arm and one of the Typhoons was still being assembled in the pits, but both bots or rather, all three are finally ready. Twin Typhoons is a pair of RAF-themed shell spinners which are a smaller version of the bot that won Series Seven of wait, Im being informed that thats Typhoon Twins, and this one is actually a pair of melties. Whatever.
Anyway, the Twin Typhoons get up to full speed very quickly, but their melty-brain drive makes them very sluggish to get out of their starting corner. If Der Metzgermeister had box-rushed them theyd be in trouble. Fortunately DM instead decides to drive over to one of the neutral corners and just sit there with its own weapon spinning and its arm raised overhead. As the Twins approach, it backs itself further into the corner. Ahh, the infamous Corner Camping strategy.
This does actually present the Twins with a problem though, as theres not space for both of them to move in without risking hitting either each other or the walls. The twin with green teeth Mai I think cautiously approaches, but when its about a foot away Der Metzgermeister darts forward like a striking snake, slamming its disc down and spewing flames. Sparks fly, and Im not quite sure what happened there, but DM gets spun sideways to its while Mai recoils and slams itself into the wall. Its momentarily nearly at a halt, but sos Der Metzgermeisters weapon, and it retreats back into the corner and resets itself, letting Mai escape. I see some scribbling at the judges table. Reminder, aggression is a criterion in this tournament.
Uhh, the flames obscured what was happening, and its hard to tell if Mai took any damage there since its a spinning blur. But it didnt look like DMs arm was low enough to make contact when its wedge got hit, so I think it mightve just hit the arena floor. Mai definitely got a hit; DMs left wedgelet has a good-sized hole in it and its bent sideways.
Now its Satonos turn to attack. Der Metzgermeister definitely isnt quick enough this time; Satono glances off its wedge and tosses itself away before DM can drop the disc. But it doesnt look like DM took much of a hit there either. Both twins get back up to speed, DM sits in its corner, spinning its disc menacingly. Mai comes in and again theres a huge hit and sparks and shards of metal go flying! Mai slams into the wall and stops. DM goes after it and wedges it, but has to back off as Satono approaches and threatens to blindside it. Theres definitely damage to the top of Mai. The top plate is badly dented in on one of the drive pods and it looks like theres damage to the wheels as well. Thats the drawback of having them so far out. But once its released, it laboriously spins up and drifts away, leaving a spiraling trail of skidmarks on the floor.
But it looks like DM took the worse end of that exchange. The disc support is twisted noticeably sideways, and while its able to raise the arm the disc isnt spinning. However, this seems to just make it angry. It finally goes on the attack, repeatedly ramming both of the twins, and at one point it manages to pin the damaged Mai, clamp it with the arm, and spew flames at it, and push it into its twin. The impact knocks Mai free again, though, and both melties continue to work, although Mais spin is wobbling and at one point it pops itself in the air and spits out bits of wheels. And the twins continue battering against DMs wedge, tearing off both wedgelets and severely mangling it. DMs right-side drivetrain dies near the end of the fight and it spends the last twenty seconds or so frantically spinning to try to keep the twins attacks at bay. However, Mai is moving at a crawl by then as well.
Judges Decision:
Damage: Der Metzgermeister 1, Twin Typhoons 4
Aggression: Der Metzgermeister 1, Twin Typhoons 4
Strategy: Der Metzgermeister 1, Twin Typhoons 4
Your winner, by a 12-3 Judges Decision, is Twin Typhoons!
Splashdown vs Icebreaker
Both weapons get up to speed, and we get the equivalent of a slow dance in the first few seconds. After a slow crawl to the center, there is an impact. Well, two to be exact. The first sends Splashdown upward a bit, and the second sends both robots away.
Splashdown goes spinning into the distance while Icebreaker jumps and stops to a different part of the arena. Splashdown goes spinning again. Icebreaker spins up as well, but it's gyroing a bit. Looks like thar second hit bent up one of the teeth on the top ring. Another exhchange sends another piece of Icebreaker flying. There's a little cut in the side tooth of Splashdown's yellow wedge.
Next couple exchanges are about the same. Another impact from the two spinners causes Icebreaker's rings to slow down a bit and make a peculiar grinding sound. Looks like the friction wheel on the inside is starting to come loose (that's the only way I can see both of Icebreaker's rings counter rotating without losing a weapon point). Another hit, and the top ring is out of commission with the bottom one barely moving.
Splashdown fixes that with a bunch of battering blows. Icebreaker is now weaponless and gets a piece torn off of the bottom spinner. The buzzer sounds as Icebreaker is saved by the bell it seems.
Aggression: 8-7 Splashdown
Damage: 11-4 Splashdown
Strategy: 10-5 Splashdown
Splashdown wins 29-16
Hobart vs Bluebot
As the match begins it becomes clear that Hobart is very reluctant to get into a head-on clash with Bluebot and keeps trying to skirt and flank, hoping to find some angle past that ground-scraping edge of Bluebots large plow. Unfortunately its drivetrain doesnt hold enough of an advantage to get around and as it approaches at a medium angle its light wedglets bounce off and up the plow of Bluebot, feeding its right weapon mount directly into the vicious eggbeater. The impact rockets Hobart backwards, completely vaporizing the weapon support system and ejecting the bar at such a vicious speed it becomes lodged solidly into the arena wall, while Bluebot rears into a stoppie and recoils across the floor but appears to still be in one piece. Hobart meanwhile
is not. One more hit from Bluebot turns most of what remains of her unlucky frame into nothing more than loose metal slag.
WINNER: BLUEBOT by KO in 0.32
Lilian vs Flash Flood
Flash Flood starts the fight as it means to go on, charging forward into Lilian and ramming her back as she rides up the front wedge. Lilian attempts to monstertruck, but the spikes on the flipping panel prevent her from doing so, and she gets turned over in fairly short order. Lilian self-rights, for all the good that does, and Flash Flood just rushes her down again, easily outwedging her and pounding her against the walls. However, trouble starts to happen when Lilian drops the hammer onto Flash Floods lid, seriously damaging the flipping mechanism and warping the panel into near-uselessness. It doesnt affect Badniks strategy much, though, and he keeps sticking close to Lilian like his name was Phillip. Its a good strategy, and it works. It goes to the judges, but its really a foregone conclusion.
Aggression: Flash Flood 9 6 Lilian
Damage: Lilian 10 5 Flash Flood
Control: Flash Flood 11 4 Lilian
Winner: Flash Flood, JD 25-20
The Theiving Magpie vs Terpischora
The battle kicks off with Magpie attempting to rush down and angle in on Terpsichora, but the drum spinner does a very good job of keeping its weapon pointed at the flipper. The attack comes in, but HFL manages to force a head-on collision with a countercharge, and this means the front of Shaba’s wedge is fed into that lethal spinner. The resultant hit sees TMP sent backflipping across the arena, Terpsichora in hot pursuit, but the wedge is now horribly bent up at the tip and looks like it’s going to be pretty ineffective from here on out. TMP gets another kicking from the drum before it self-rights, and it’s looking pretty beaten up, but it’s able to retreat and regroup for another attack, coming in at an angle. It does manage to briefly get underneath, but Terp’s weapon gyros it off the wedge when Mag goes for the flip and OH! Oh, that’s just NASTY! Terpsichora drives into the gaping maw of the Thieving Magpie and just chews the absolute fuck out of its innards! There’s batteries spewed out everywhere, the whole thing’s just a wreck, all sorts. Shaba’s counted out and cease is called, and there’s no doubt that this one was worth the wait.
Winner: Terpsichora, KO by Evisceration, 01:17
Backstab vs Ramshock
This is the kind of wedge fight that would happen if sewer snake went up against sewer snake. And by that, I mean that neither of these fuckers can control each other for more than a hot minute. That being said what little control there is is mostly going in ramshocks favor because pressing wedge. Backstab tries to pull off a monster-truck into wedge from the rear move against ramshock, but the inherent problem with that strategy is that ramshock, well, keeps going foreward in the time that backstab takes to land, regain control, and then move backwards. Still, it almost looked sick. And uh, yeah, thats more or less the whole fight lol.
Aggression: 8-7 Ramshock
Damage: 8-7 Backstab
Control: 9-6 Ramshock
Your winner, in a 24-21 decision, is Ramshock!
Burger Princess vs Killjoy II
...And after a postponement because Killjoy burned out a motor during the twitch test and had to do a very fast replacement in the pits, were finally ready to get this fight started! Killjoy II has its anti-spinner plow mounted to help it survive the massive hits Burger Princess can dish out, and Burger Princess has decided to start this fight upside-down so its disc rides a bit higher and possibly protects it from saw attacks.
The match begins, and Burger Princess immediately starts spinning up, and trundles laboriously forward at an angle. Killjoy streaks forward, leaving a trail of rubber on the floor, but as it turns to compensate for BPs movement it skids sideways, and BP gets past it and into the middle of the arena. Killjoy comes up behind it and briefly wedges BPs wheel, but the disc pokes out the back of the robot too, and it scrapes against Killjoys armor enough to pop it free of the wedge. And thats enough time for Burger Princess to get up to full speed!
Burger Princess decides to just sit in one spot and point the weapon at its opponent, so Killjoy has no choice but to charge. And BANG! Burger Princess goes flying across the arena, but Killjoy took a big hit as well, and theres already a gash about halfway up Killjoys wedge. BPs disc hits the floor as it lands, but it bounces onto its wheels pretty quickly. Killjoy charges it again, but its a little off-course and ends up being hit on the side of its wedge, which sends it twirling away. But this also spins Burger Princess around, and since the disc is tilted with it upside-down, the gyroscopic forces lift its wheels into the air! It skids across the arena, then the disc hits the ground and catapults it into the wall. It bounces off with no sparks so either its wheel or its chassis was what hit, but its still in a bad position.
Before BP can get away from the wall, Killjoy slams into it again. The impact bounces the spinner off the wall again and flips it over, but now there are two gashes in Killjoys wedge and a hole in its side.
Killjoy keeps ramming, BP keeps pretty much just sitting there and letting Killjoy come to it and get hit, then bouncing away and lumbering back into the middle of the arena. However, Burger Princess is acting as a true undercutter now, and starts really tearing up the lip of Killjoys wedge with subsequent hits. Then a wheelie from Killjoy at just the wrong time lets Burger Princess get its blade under the wedge. Sparks and bits of metal fly everywhere, then something catches and both bots go flying sideways again. But Killjoys had half the left panel torn free of its wedge, and the front seems like its flopping around more than it should. Burger Princess takes its central position again, daring Killjoy to approach. Killjoy does
and its another massive hit!
Burger Princess ricochets off the wall again, but Killjoy is also sent skidding into the corner. The wedge is just torn open on the right side and is hanging loose. Another hit could tear it off entirely, but it may not matter because Killjoy II isnt moving at all!
Your winner, by knockout in 1:38, is Burger Princess!
Krakatoa vs Dreamchaser
Theres neither stats for a plow config nor a picture in the main signups, so IDK where youre getting the plow config from, my dude. The match starts and both bots are out on the aggressive, Dreamchaser immediately moving to strafe around to the side of Krakatoa. Problem being, krakatoas still plenty fast enough to just turn in place and deny access to its sides. Laz is eventually able to line up a good slam, and takes dreamchaser into a wall. Its drum is grinding at the lifter a bit, but the top arm is out of the way and everything else is rather hard to reach, so no real damage just yet.
We get the same interaction a few more times. At about the halfway point, dreamchasers able to hit Krakatoas front at a slight off-angle, which turns the bot at an angle, and allows for dreamchaser to push in at an angle before either driver can really react. This impact bends up the outer fork of Krakatoa a bit, and sends it in a soaring 360 that prevents Dreamchaser from getting any follow up hits, with Krakatoa getting right back underneath Dreamchaser, and sending it right back into the walls. Dreamchasers able to keep on racking up hits like this over the next minute and a half of the match, but these hits arent easily chain-able, and all they really do is continue to make that one sides fork more and more wonky, until it eventually breaks off the other side is still a fine wedge, so Laz is still able to more or less control the match.
Aggression: 9-6 Krakatoa
Damage: 9-6 Dreamchaser
Control: 8-7 Krakatoa
Your winner, in a split 23-22 decision, is Krakatoa!
Middleweights
Axtinguisher vs Neurotoxin
Mecanums or not, 5/3 doesnt beat 7/6, 4WD wedge rarely beats out 2WD wedge, and 12 weapon doesnt beat 12 armor. Its really a bit of a stomp, despite Alexs best efforts to the contrary, because even when he does get under, Neurotoxin just backs off, hammer strikes be damned.
Aggression: 9-6 Neurotoxin
Damage: 8-7 Axtinguisher
Control: 10-5 Neurotoxin
Your winner, in a 24-21 decision, is neurotoxin!
Gigaflare vs Blue Max
Gigaflare charges forward, intent on stifling Blue Maxs blade before it gets up to speed. It
doesnt go well. A crashing hit to the right hand side of the wedge spins both bots away, Blue Max slipping and sliding all over the place due to its low traction and the knockup from the impact. Gigaflare, on the other hand, just bounces into the wall and gets back into the fight, one of the spark cannons having prematurely exploded courtesy of the impact. Theres a big nick in the side of the wedge, though, and Tri is able to mount another offensive. This time hes not so lucky. Blue Maxs flailing has left it in a position such that, as Gigaflare goes in for a crush, the big bar of Blue Max slams into one of the self-righting winglets, tearing it off and crashing into the wedge from behind. The Nuclear Heat Visor is more reminiscent of Radioactive Mans famous goggles at this point, and Tri can only watch in horror as his bot is sent careening arse over tit into the middle distance. It comes to a crunching halt against the wall of the arena, flops around trying to self-right, and is eventually counted out.
Winner: Blue Max, KO 1:49
Neophyte Redglare vs Dragonfist
Hey look, its another flail spinner this time a shell instead of a melty.
Dragonfists shell starts to whip up to speed, but Neophyte Redglares fast, and Dragonfist doesnt get very far out of the corner before it gets hit. Its a glancing blow and lets Dragonfist escape and get up to full speed, but its barely scratched Redglare, and it just comes in again and takes the full impact of those flails on its front plow with no fear whatsoever.
And, lets be honest, this is pretty much a three-minute brick-fest. Redglares wedge bounces Dragonfists flails up into its exposed front-hinged forks, so those get progressively more bent and eventually torn off, but otherwise its not taking any serious damage. Neither is Dragonfist, but it is being continuously bullied around the arena. It gets flipped over three times two from Maulers, one from Redglare managing to overturn it by pushing it against the wall with its lifter but its top pole rights it every time. However, it spends most of the fight running away and trying to get its weapon spun up, and most of the rest pinballing around the arena.
Judges Decision:
Damage: Dragonfist 4, Neophyte Redglare 1
Aggression: Dragonfist 1, Neophyte Redglare 4
Control: Dragonfist 1, Neophyte Redglare 4
Your winner, by a 9-6 Judges Decision, is Neophyte Redglare!
Hati vs Frogbot
The match begins and both bots on the offensive and both of them are fast. However, Hati is the slightly quicker of the two and manages to get under Frogbot a few times. However, Hati has a difficult time using that to his advantage due to Frogbot's quick maneuvering-save for one slam into the high wall. Then the fight for the next 2 minutes is nothing but Hati and Frogbot circling each other, trying to get the right angle, but neither giving an inch. Then, with 20 seconds to go, the two meet and Hati gets under a corner of Frogbot and starts taking it to the wall, but the green flipper's wide wheelbase makes Frogbot able to turn off. It wheels around and catches Hati with the flipper. POP Hati goes for a ride, but lands just short of the wall and time is called before Hati can retaliate. This is going to the judges!
Aggression: 8-7 Hati
Damage: 9-6 Frogbot
Control: 8-7 Hati
Frogbot wins in a 23-22 split decision!
Smackdown vs Outrage
Outrage enters the arena in its special overhead-bar configuration, aka having Wolf put it in upside down. Smackdown enters the arena in its special completely-bog-standard configuration. The battle starts with Smackdown barrelling towards Outrages left track pod, and Wolf tries to correct for it before the hammer comes down. However, despite the fact that he cant really *do* that with his atrocious Speed/Traction differential, it doesnt really matter; the Patbots axe has such a long shaft that the head smashes down on the bar anyway. While the blow does bend the bar down into the track pods and causes some pretty nasty damage, the axe itself is shattered by the force of the spinner. Outrage is able (just about) to extricate itself from off Smackdowns wedgelets and deal a crippling blow, slicing Pats machine almost totally in half.
Winner: Outrage, KO 0:26
Dredd vs Flame Grilled
So uh, yeah, this fight is a lot of FG getting bossed the fuck around, as Dredd just kinda has its way with it even when FG does get under, dredd just... backs off. FG is also remarkably hesistant about using its hammer for a hammerbot thats losing the wedge war constantly, which is a bit weird. it does start denting the top of Dredds plow by the end of the match, but thats about it.
Aggression: 11-4 Dredd
Damage: 8-7 Flame Grilled
Control: 15-0 Dredd
Your winner, in a 33-12 JD, is Dredd!
Vortex vs Harpy
This is largely a fight of wedge advantage at the start, as harpy rams itself up vortexs wedge and shoved a short distance towards a wall and flipped into it. harpy bounces off, some of it overhanging the top of the wall a tad, before it rocks back into the arena. Harpys right back on the offensive, and again goes straight at vortex, which obliges. Unable to really get any shoving in, giraffe flips immediately, again sending harpy flying. This happens for quite a bit longer no real attempt on the part of harpy to get around vortexs wedge, vortex getting in free flips before shaba finally tries to angle in around the 2 minute mark. This proves more effective, and shes able to do some bossing of her own, getting in a nice pin in a corner, before being flipped once more as the match comes to a close.
Aggresion: 10-5 Harpy
Damage: 8-7 Vortex
Control: 11-4 Vortex
Vortex wins in a 24-21 decision!
Black Dog II vs Champ
Yeah no, you're not just missing his wedge entirely :V.
Black Dog's drum spins up to it's low death hum growl. Champ gnashes it's teeth hungrily. Champ is the aggressor, plowing right into black dog, a bold move. Champ's one and only chance of wedging Black Dog, at all, his prized golden wedge, is gone in seconds. The dog smells blood, and a piece of purple lip goes across the arena. Oh hey, he managed to lose a tooth. He's also dangerously close to the arena wall. He tries to run off, but Black Dog is just too fast. Another two crunching blows to the jaw sends Champ up and out. Champ he is no longer.
Black Dog wins by OOTA in 1:35
Heavyweights
Magnolia Grande vs Neuromancer
Neuromancer barrels out of the starting blocks like a bull at a gate, but Force has seen this coming and backs out of the way a little bit. Neuromancer does have time to correct for this, though, as 10mph is hardly jetting backwards, and the plough impacts with the left-hand spinner just as its starting to get up to speed. The impact judders a few things loose on Neuromancer, but of more note is what happens to Magnolia Grande its fired back into the wall, smashing the right-hand spinner against it and carving a gash in the side. Neuromancer recovers first, despite the wedge having taken a right pummelling, and continues to shove MG into the side wall. It gets the lifter underneath the left spinner and lifts Force up, beaching the deathspinner momentarily on its side against the wall. Because of how the spinners are linked to the same engine, Magnolia Grande cant spin up to bounce itself away from the wall, and the radial engine stalls out. The drive still works, though, and it manages to shake itself down, only for Neuromancer to lift it up again. This time, one of the bars gets trapped on the wrong side of the wall extenders, locking MG in place and counting it out. Its honours even in week one for PTU and Force.
Winner: Neuromancer, KO by Immobilization 1:25
Lambastor vs Boy Flaily
So far it hasnt been a good day for the flails, but weve got another one entering the arena right now. Boy Flailys got a spinning top with retractable flails lets see if that gives it an advantage?
The fight starts, and Lambastor comes out quick, but Boy Flaily is already getting that weapon up to speed and getting out of its corner. Lambastor comes in and tries to go for its side, but gets swatted away by Boy Flailys partially-extended flails. They werent at full speed but BF was able to slip past and get into the middle of the arena, and now it finally gets them extended all the way!
Lambastors only option is to charge into the circle of death, which it does without much effect. Sparks fly and the repeated hits knock both machines sideways, but one of Lambastors side wedges already has a hole punched in it. Boy Flaily retreats away, retracting its flails a bit, and knocks Lambastor off-course again, catching the corner of the wedge as the second flail comes around. Lambastors left wedgelet is noticeably bent and flopping around now like somethings been torn loose.
Another attack from Lambastor, and this time it catches BFs flail head-on and deflects it upwards, and that seems to put BF off-balance a bit. Lambastor manages to slow the flails and get under BFs wedgelets, but its lifters too slow to tip it over before BF slips away and starts to spin up again.
BF manages to stay away long enough to get up to speed and start extending its flails, thanks in part to Lambastors wedge getting momentarily caught on a floor seam. But a few seconds later it, too, gets its sharp wedgelets stuck, letting Lambastor go straight for its side! Unfortunately, BF is, you know, still spinning! Its a huge hit! Lambastors left wedgelet is completely torn off!
Lambastor keeps attacking, but at this point its a battle for survival, and one it isnt winning. More hits further tear up the mounting for the severed wedgelet, bend one of the lifting forks, and tear the other off. A body blow smashes the lexan wheelguard and damages Lambastors left front wheel. Its stuck going in circles, and smoke starts to come out of it! Now Boy Flaily is free to spin up at its leisure, and thats just what it does, coming in for strike after strike and completely rearranging Lambastors face until it finally stops moving.
For those of you watching in the pits, may I direct your attention to the pristine anti-spinner wedge setup sitting on Team TBRs pit table. Not a scratch on that thing folks, because it hasnt gone into the arena. Was there method to this madness? It doesnt matter, because...
Your winner, by knockout in 2:20, is Boy Flaily!
Death Metal vs Hellhound
Classic fight here. Two familiar faces.
Hellhound wastes no time, rushing towards Death Metal, who luckily gets some distance from the wall. She begins to turn away from the rushing bull. Is she flanking? Laz isn't gonna let us find out as he plows into the spinner, but only the edge of the blade. The blade skips off the plow and turns Death Metal away slightly to the side. Hellhound's side. Death Metal turns quickly and catches an edge of Hellhound's plow! Oof. There's a cut there now, and it looks hella warped.
The bastardized bloodhound didn't like that one bit and gets a good hold of the tombclone. It goes into the wall. And again! and this time HH holds DM for the full pin timer. Danielle can't get away. Laz lifts the plow up and gets Death Metal almost stuck on the wall. It wheelies itself back down with a thud and spins back up. It tries aiming for the weakened side, but Hellhound isn't falling for that trick again. It picks up Death Metal again while hitting the spinner. You can hear the blade battering and grinding against the giant ABR wedge. There are a few cuts in the plow, some decent size. But it's not enough to phase Hellhound as it makes another huge slam into the wall.
The blade ricochets and sends it out of HH's reach. Hellhound turns around as Danielle turns a bit, desperately trying to get the blade back up to max speed. But here comes the namesake of Tartarus Robotics! The plow's tiny holes start turning into a slightly bigger one as DM gets sent flying, it's body moving in all sorts of directions from the gyro.
Hellhound wedges under and sends it into, what a surprise...another wall. But DM's blade isn't up to speed after that last exchange. It stuffs it, attempting to flip it up again, but it just isn't happening for it. Death Metal spins up once more and hurls itself at one of the sides. It comes up just short, but it still hits the front of the plow. The weld that holds the two pieces of ABR wedge is really starting to come loose now. The match ends with both bots hurting. 10 seconds after, Death Metal's weapon motor starts smoking lightly. How do you judge this one?
Aggression: 8-7 Hellhound
Damage: 11-4 Death Metal
Strategy: 10-5 Hellhound
Death Metal wins 23-22
Coronal Mass Ejection vs Tongue of the Fatman
CME is quick out of the blocks. But Fatman is no slouch either. Although he kinda drags himself along with his angled wheels. He now faces his opponent, showing it's ugly grin and it tumbles towards it. CME drives around a bit looking for an opening, but that face keeps watching. Until he slips under quickly, angling in. He flips the big boi over and starts pushing it. Normally TotF would go skyrocketing upward with that strong of a flipper. But with the rod being so far back, not only does he go half his usual height, he also does a barrel roll to the other side of the arena, landing right side up. CME gets another flip in, but Fatman stays up. Here we go again, circling TotF. Except this time it's Fatman that gets under. Oh boy. Cue the crowd going WOAHHH as CME goes flying and crashes into The Box's ceiling. It crashes back to earth relatively unscathed. It seems to have the edge in speed, and so it's getting more of the flips in. Fatman does another barrel roll and rights itself 2, 3 times over. You'd think it would be running out of gas after all this. Luckily gets another lucky shot at the spatula flipper. This time CME gets perched on one of the high walls. It uses it's flipper to drop back down. The match ends with CME getting more flips, but Fatman easily getting the crowd's attention.
Aggression: 10-5 CME
Damage: 9-6 Tongue of the Fatman
Strategy: 10-5 CME
Coronal Mass Ejection wins 26-19
Tulta Munille vs Vertigo
All right, weve got two interesting designs here. Vertigos latest incarnation has its trademark vertical spinner mounted on an articulated arm, and Tulta Munilles a swiss-army bot which is currently mounting a very sturdy shock-mounted flipping plow.
Anyway, the fight starts, Vertigo spins up, and both bots are having trouble really getting their weapons to bear because neither is handling very well at the moment. Tulta gets under Vertigos corner first, but Vertigo slips off before it can get a flip in. Vertigo gets a glancing blow on Tultas plow which does pretty much nothing. Tulta gets a flip, but turns itself over in the process and cant capitalize on its advantage while Vertigo self-rights.
Vertigo finally manages to get under Tultas plow and sends it flying, but Tulta self-rights and no real damage is done. Tulta returns fire with a couple massive flips, nearly flinging Vertigo out of the arena. I mean, Im making it sound more exciting than it is, since really its more like just watching two drunk guys duke it out.
But then Vertigo finally gets to the side of Tulta Munille! Bang! Its a huge hit, and Tulta goes flying! It lands on its roof with a massive gash in its side, and the bots making a noise like a steam locomotive. The pneumatic system must have been damaged! Tultas wheels stick out of its top a little bit, but the weapon mount is kind of a pivot point, and the weight of that huge plow moves its center of gravity way forward, so its basically balanced on the weapon mount and the plow with its wheels in the air. It spins its wheels back and forth, trying to rock itself into a stable orientation, but it isnt enough, and it gets counted out with just twelve seconds left.
Your winner, by knockout in 2:48, is Vertigo!
Tabor Mk II vs The CMC
Sweetiebelle leads the raid against Tabor while Tabor presses his wedge and...charges? You sure you didn't mean the other way around? So Tabor is sluggish out of the gate with it's wedge pressed, but luckily it gets under Sweetiebelle and flips it over. It turns it's lifter to face Scootaloo. It manages to lift it up and flip it, but gets flipped from the other side in the process kudos to Applebloom. The other two have righted themselves, and are now getting under the inverted Tabor. They begin to flip it back and forth while Tabor goes batshit, spinning the turret and activating the lifter. It eventually rights itself, and is now getting under Scootaloo and putting it on it's back. It attempts lifting and piling Applebloom on the other part of the cluster, but both self right accordingly. It turns the lifter to get under one from the side, but that just gives it easy access to the side of it's wedge. Flipped again. More flipping. Flippity flip flip. That's all I have to say. The buzzer sounds after a few more exchanges.
Aggression: 8-7 Tabor
Damage: 10-5 CMC
Strategy: 10-5 CMC
The CMC wins 27-18
Highland Fling 2 vs Carbon Z
Highland Fling is a difficult robot to face, mostly because it can stonewall non-damaging opponents. However, GF has a plan for this one wait for the referees to force Tri to show movement, then engage from close range when it de-Glunks. This comes into play almost immediately, as HF2 is almost immediately forced to de-Glunk with Carbon Z inches away from it. The black and yellow machine lifts up the flailing face spinner and parades it around for a bit, and the fight continues in this vein for the full three minutes. It was a bit of a shit fight, to be honest, but it was always going to be - and it was only going to go one way, too.
Aggression: Carbon Z 12 3 Highland Fling 2
Control: Carbon Z 13 2 Highland Fling 2
Damage: Carbon Z 8 7 Highland Fling 2
Winner: Carbon Z, JD 33-12
StarStruck vs ICR Speedwagon
Starstruck comes out of its square, and the weapon is soon moving in a technicolor blur, but ICR Speed Wagon’s right after it. Starstruck narrowly avoids getting hit within three seconds of the starting buzzer. It gets more or less spun up and away from the wall, but ICR Speedwagon goes for an attack on its right side. Starstruck’s blade still makes contact, and the bots are thrust away about ten feet in opposite directions, with Starstruck taking the worst of the knockback. That hit definitely took some paint off ICR’s right wedgelet and might’ve bent it a little, but otherwise good deflection by the wedge.
ICR Speedwagon keeps up the pressure, and rams Starstruck again, still coming in at an angle. This time it doesn’t pull off the angle-in tactic quite as well, and Starstruck spins ICR Speedwagon away, but it pops itself in the air in the process, and thanks to the magic of gyroscopic forces bounces down at an angle on its right side, then scrapes the floor with its disc as it lands from that. And that’s the opportunity ICR Speedwagon needs to come in and get under Starstruck’s side for real. It looks like it might be able to get a flip, but how safely it can do so is questionable, so it starts pushing Starstruck towards the wall instead, and almost gets it there before Starstruck manages to turn and swipe ICR Speedwagon again and knock itself free.
A couple more hits are exchanged, and ICR gets under the front of Starstruck and slams it backwards into the wall. It’s a high one, so an OOTA’s unlikely with ICR’s flipper, but it fires, uhh, the front-hinged one. They claimed in the pits it would be safer, and no it isn’t! The flipper has enough bite to give Starstruck a good toss, but as it reaches the end of its stroke it enters the radius of Starstruck’s disc, and that’s a massive hit! Starstruck flies away and does a faceplant as it lands, but its pink hoop springs it back onto its wheels. ICR Speedwagon’s front-hinged flipper has had a big gash torn into the side. It retracts very slowly and only about two thirds of the way, and it’s noticeably bent sideways.
To make matters worse, the time ICR Speedwagon takes waiting for the damaged flipper to retract lets Starstruck spin up again. The two bots face off. This time ICR puts more effort into trying to go for its sides, and because ICR’s got an angled spinner and naturally tends to take weight off its drive wheels when it turns in the direction of its rotation, ICR is able to juke it and take advantage of the oversteer. This time it takes Starstruck to the low wall, and up goes the rear-hinged flipper. There’s some sparks, and it looks like Starstruck’s weapon made contact, throwing off ICR’s flip and possibly saving it from an OOTA, but it didn’t manage to damage the weapon this time. Starstruck’s still going pretty quickly though and ICR Speedwagon has to retreat.
There’s a bit more back and forth. ICR Speedwagon wedges Starstruck from the front again. Starstruck’s blade scrapes harmlessly off the armor – until it rides up and strikes the damaged front-hinged flipper! There’s a huge hit, and the bent flipper gets torn free of its hinges, hanging onto the bot at an odd angle just by the bent cylinder rod. It’s like a gruesome robot hangnail! But the impact tosses Starstruck into the wall again. Before it can spin up, ICR Speedwagon comes in and gets a flip! This puts Starstruck on its rear against the wall. Its drive wheels stick out the back so it’s able to maneuver away and reverse to flop back down upright, but ICR just flips it again! Starstuck ends up inverted – its hoops start to roll it over but there’s a wall in the way! I don’t think it can self-right from there! But wait – Starstruck’s weapon starts spinning up! The torque spins it away from the wall, and it precesses, tilting further forward in the process until its disc hits the floor, tearing a hole in the floor panel and sending Starstruck flying! It lands inverted with the weapon stopped, but rolls back upright this time.
Starstruck is able to finish off the front-hinged flipper of ICR Speedwagon, as well as caving in one of the inside panels of the front forks and tearing off an outer side panel of the rear-hinged flipper. By the end of the fight there’s enough damage to ICR’s wedges that Starstruck even manages to get under it with its sloped side panels once, resulting in ICR being tossed across the arena like a frizbee. But ICR gets another flip near the end. It doesn’t even overturn Starstruck, but it proves its weapon’s still working, and it’s been by far the more aggressive.
Judges’ Decision:
Damage: Starstruck 5, ICR Speedwagon 0
Aggression: Starstruck 1, ICR Speedwagon 4
Control: Starstruck 2, ICR Speedwagon 3
Your winner, by an 8-7 Judges’ Decision, is Starstruck!